


The Girl in My Nightmares

by Mica288



Category: Hey Arnold!
Genre: F/M, Friendship, High School, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-28
Updated: 2019-04-12
Packaged: 2019-12-25 23:23:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 43,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18271199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mica288/pseuds/Mica288
Summary: They're in high school now, and Helga is soon realizing she needs to get over Arnold and move on, but what will happen now that Arnold can't help falling for her? Will they let things like fear get in the way, or will they come together at last?A simple narrative of how I imagined their story would go. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it! =)Ps. The movies aren't being cosidered here.





	1. I Like Your Bow

**Author's Note:**

> I started this many years ago and wrote the first chapters. Then, life got in the way and I left it unfinished.   
> I finally have the time and mind to write again, so I decided to pick up where I left off (with a little editing, of course).   
> Happy reading, and all the best!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 1 – I Like Your Bow **

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

I was lying in bed looking up at the black night through the glass ceiling in my bedroom, but the starry view wasn’t doing anything to lighten my mood. What was supposed to be a very fun weekend was suddenly turning into a nightmare.

“I can’t believe I’m stuck with Helga for the whole weekend”, I grumbled and sat up on the bed.

Gerald, who was sitting at my desk working on his laptop, turned around to face me. “I’m sorry, man. I wish I could go too, but it’s just for one night. How bad could it be?”

I raised an eyebrow. “With _Helga_?”

The fact that we were now in our junior year of high school, and that I was at least a foot taller than Helga, hadn’t changed a thing between us. She still bullied me around and called me a football head.

Gerald, Phoebe, Helga and I were supposed to go camping that weekend to find some insects we needed for our final science project, but Phoebe had called to say she was sick, and now Gerald was telling me he was visiting his grandparents and couldn’t make it, so now I was stuck with Helga.

Gerald laughed. “Okay, so it might be pretty bad”.

“Not just bad, Gerald. It’s gonna be a nightmare.”

Gerald closed his laptop and walked up to me on the bed. “Don’t worry about it, man! It’ll be fine.” We did our handshake thing and he headed towards the door. “Just try not to kill each other.” He smirked and closed the door behind him.

I lay back on the bed and looked up at the sky again. _A whole night with Helga… What a nightmare!_ I took a deep breath.

Then I remembered another time we’d spent that much time alone together for another science project. It hadn’t been fun, but it had worked out fine in the end. Maybe it would work out fine this time too.

I heard a knock and then Grandpa poked his head round the side of the door. “Hey there, Shortman! I brought you some dinner.”

I hardly looked his way or even noticed when he came through the door. “Thanks, Grandpa. Just leave it on the desk.”

He crossed the room and placed the tray he was carrying on the desk. “What’s wrong, Arnold? You seemed so excited this morning about going camping with your friends.”

“That’s just it, Grandpa! None of my friends are coming. It’s just gonna be me and _Helga_.”

Just mentioning it made my stomach turn.

“Helga, ey?” He narrowed his eyes and came over to sit next to me on the bed. “Isn’t she the one with the huge bow on her head and the one eyebrow?”

“That’s the one.”

I couldn’t believe she still wore that pink bow on her head. I still had my blue hat stored in a box somewhere, but I hadn’t worn it in years.

Grandpa chuckled and glanced at me sideways. “I'd think you wouldn´t mind spending some time alone with her.”

“What gives you  _that_  idea, Grandpa?”

“Oh, I don't know… just thinking about that crush you had on her back in pre-school.”

“W… wait, _what_?!” I pushed myself up from the bed and turned towards Grandpa. “What did you just say? I've  _never_  had a crush on  _Helga_! Are you crazy? Why would you think that?”

“Well… you always came home chattering about how pretty her blonde hair was with her pink bow and how smart she was.” He smiled and then his face turned thoughtful. “Up until she started calling you football head and bullying you.”

I lay back down, shaking my head. “You're way off base, Grandpa. I'm sure I was just being nice.”

“Well… I'm sure it will all turn out okay. You should try to get some sleep. We’ve got an early rise tomorrow.” He stood up and walked to the door. “Good night, Arnold.”

“Night, Grandpa.”

Early the next morning I got up to get all my stuff ready and get dressed. I was still in boxer shorts, pulling my jeans up my legs, when I heard a knock on the door and invited who I thought was Grandpa to come in.

“Hey, football head! You ready to-“

“H-Helga?” I yanked my jeans up and reached for the first t-shirt I could find and slipped it over my head. “I… I’m sorry. I thought you were Grandpa.”

As I was pulling my shirt down, I noticed the way Helga’s eyes turned huge. They slowly started to make their way up to my face and then, as if a bucket of ice-cold water had been dumped over her head, her stunned expression turned into a glare.

“You should ask people who they are before you let them in, football head! No one wants to see your pitiful excuse for a body.”

I rolled my eyes and bent down to put my sneakers on. “I said I was sorry.”

Helga crossed her arms and shrugged. “Whatever. You ready to go?”

“Yeah.”

I grabbed my backpack and we headed out the door and down the stairs. Grandpa was already waiting for us outside to drive us up to the campsite. Within an hour we had arrived. Grandpa helped us unload the car and then gave me a pat on the back before climbing into the driver's seat.

“Take care, Shortman. I'll pick you up tomorrow. Have fun!”

Helga and I both stood there, our backpacks and stuff scattered around us on the ground, as we watched grandpa's car drive away and disappear out of sight.

“Guess it's just you and me now, football head.”

“Guess so.”

“So, what's the deal? We catch a bunch of bugs to take home and that's it?”

“Pretty much.”

“I don't see why we couldn't just look for insects in our own backyards.”

I rolled my eyes and took a deep breath. We’d been there for what, thirty seconds, and she was already complaining?

“There are some insects we won't find in our backyards, Helga. And the whole idea of camping was to have fun. It was supposed to be the four of us.”

“It's not like I'm so excited about being stuck here with you either, football head.”

“Whatever, Helga. Let's just start setting up camp.”

We walked around the woods for a while until we found a good spot for our tents. There weren't many people camping nearby, just a young couple up the hill and a large family down by the river.

As I started to unpack, I noticed some of my stuff was missing.

“What's wrong, Arnoldo? Forget something?”

“Yeah…” I grumbled. “I can't find the bag with my tent and sleeping bag in it. I think I left it back home.”

“Well, that was a  _stupid_  thing to do!”

“Yeah… no kiddin’, Helga.”

I kept looking but I knew I had definitely forgotten it.

“Look… don’t worry, okay?” I heard Helga say. “My tent is big enough for two. We can share it.”

I frowned a little. It wasn’t like Helga to want to do something nice for me for a change. “Do you really mean that?”

“Geez, football head! I know I'm not exactly the most warm-hearted person you know, but I wouldn't let you sleep out in the cold.”

Our eyes met for a moment and then she shrugged and went back to unpacking. “Just don't get any crazy ideas, okay? I'm sharing my tent, but there's  _no way_ _in hell_ I'm sharing my sleeping bag with _you_.”

I chuckled. “Don’t worry, Helga. I don’t want to share your sleeping bag any more than you do.”

For a moment, Helga seemed hurt, but she quickly recovered and said, “Finally something we can agree on”.  

She pulled her tent out of its bag and started stretching it out on the grass. I walked over to help her and we silently started working together to set the tent.

“So…” Helga said after we were done. “What now?”

I grabbed a box of mini jars from my backpack and handed a few to Helga. “Now we go look for bugs.”

We headed deeper into the woods in search of insects and the whole afternoon went by. It was soon starting to get dark.

“I think we've got enough bugs now, football head. Can we  _please_  head back to camp? I'm tired and I'm hungry.”

I finished catching the last insect in a jar and looked up at the clouds. “Yeah, I think that's a good idea. It's getting pretty dark and it looks like rain. Do you know which way's camp?”

Helga's eyes turned huge. “ _Excuse_  me?!”, she shrieked. “What do you mean  _which way is camp_!?”

I looked around for a moment deciding which path to take. “I think it's this way.”

“You  _think_ it's this way?” She threw her hands up in the air and growled. “ _Crimeny!_  I thought you knew where we were! I can't believe you got us lost,  _football_  head!”

“Calm down, Helga. We're not lost. Let's just go back this way.”

“I'm not going  _anywhere_  with you, bucko! Not until we figure out where we are.” She sat down on a rock for a second and then abruptly stood up. “I got an idea.” She walked over to the nearest tree and reached for the lowest branch. “I'm climbing up to see if I can spot camp from up there.”

"I'm not sure that's a good idea, Helga. That´s pretty high up."

"What do  _you_  know? You got us lost, remember?"

"We're not lost, Helga. C'mon, I'm pretty sure it's this way." I started walking in that direction when I heard a branch crack and a big thump on the ground. I turned to see Helga lying on her back and ran back as fast as I could.

"Helga?!" I lifted her head up and patted her cheek so she'd open her eyes. "Helga, are you okay?"

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I opened my eyes and saw his worried face looking down at me.

"Helga, are you okay?"

I blinked a few times feeling disoriented.

“Are you okay, Helga?”

“I think so.” I tried to stand up but felt a sharp pain in my ankle. “Ow! No, I think I broke my ankle.”

Arnold grabbed my foot and gently started examining it. "It doesn't look broken. You probably just sprained it." He leaned in closer to me, put my arms around his neck and scooped me off the floor.

As I felt my body being lifted, I tightened my arms around his neck. "What the hell are you doing, football head? Put me down!"

Arnold started walking in the direction he thought was camp. "I'm carrying you back to camp, Helga. It's getting dark and you won't be able to walk back. I promise I won't drop you."

As we headed towards camp, I couldn't help think about how easily he'd lifted me off the ground. Arnold had always been the skinny type, but for some years now what used to be nothing but a bony chest and lanky arms was now a set of well-defined muscles. Not bulky or anything, just enough to call him athletic. And the thought of those muscles rippling under his shirt as he carried me was enough to make me swoon.

I could tell he was struggling with my weight, but he still continued to walk and carried me all the way back to camp, my heartbeat racing the whole time. He took me into the tent and settled me on my sleeping bag.

I took my sock and shoe off, and examined my foot. “Great, just what I needed! It’s already starting to swell!”

Arnold disappeared through the gap in the tent and came back with some kind of gel lotion in his hand. “I think this might help.”

He placed my foot on his lap and I watched as he carefully started rubbing the gel on my swollen ankle.

"What is that?"

Arnold looked up at me and smiled in a way that could make any girl's heart skip a beat and said, "It'll keep the swelling down."

_Damn football head for smiling at me like that! How could I ever think straight with him smiling at me like that?_

When he was done rubbing the gel on my ankle, he wrapped a bandage around it, and I was suddenly sorry I hadn’t sprained my other ankle and both wrists.

We sat there in silence for a while and then raindrops started to hit the tent. Arnold pulled the little tent window open and we watched as the light rain turned into a downpour.

“So much for lighting a campfire”, Arnold said.

“It’s okay. I’m beat anyway.”

I folded my legs to my chest and hugged my knees. Moments turned into seconds and seconds turned into minutes as the rain gradually started to thin out until it finally stopped altogether. The moon settled in the sky, lighting up the treetops.

“Hey… Arnold?” I said. “Thank you”

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

I had never really understood Helga. Most times I couldn’t stand her, but then there were other rare moments, like this one, that puzzled me. It was like watching something rise to the surface after being hidden for too long; like seeing a whole different Helga that had always been there, right beneath the surface, but too afraid to come out.

“Thank you for what, Helga?”

“For helping me. I’d be soaking right now if you hadn’t carried me back.”

“You’re welcome.”

She blushed and looked away. _How could she be such a bully sometimes and then look so vulnerable? Why did she sometimes look at me in a way that made me feel unsure? Why was I suddenly feeling nervous?_

I grabbed a couple of sandwiches that Grandma had packed for us and offered one to Helga. She took it with a mumbled thanks and a half smile.

"I wonder what Gerald and Phoebe are doing," Helga said after a while.

I thought about it for a second and then said, "Gerald's probably watching TV at his grandparents' and I bet Phoebe's lying in bed reading or something."

Helga snorted at the picture that formed in her mind. "You're probably right. I don't think they're having much more fun than we are."

After Helga finished her sandwich, she slid into her sleeping bag and let her hair fall down, placing her pink ribbon on the side of her pillow. The thick tresses of her yellow hair hung loosely over her shoulders and back and I realized I'd never noticed how long it really was, or how beautiful. She lay down on her side facing me and rested her head on the pillow, but her eyes were looking down, her long dark lashes almost brushing her round cheeks.

Without a lamp or a campfire burning outside, the only light we had was the moonlight coming in through the small window on the side of the tent.

When I lay back on the floor I turned my head to look at Helga and wondered if she'd fallen asleep. Her eyes were closed and her breathing was calm and even. A lock of her hair had fallen down the side of her face and my fingers itched to brush it aside.

I felt my pulse race as I continued to watch her.

I slid my eyes away from her face and caught sight of the pink ribbon resting beside her pillow. An image of a four-year-old Helga flashed into my mind. She was wearing that same ribbon on her head and she was soaking wet. It was raining and it was cold.

That was the first time I met Helga. She had looked nice with her pink bow and matching pants, and it hadn't mattered to me that she was covered in mud. She had been nice when I first met her and I had actually _liked_ her. Maybe what Grandpa had said wasn’t that crazy after all.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I closed my eyes and hoped to fall asleep soon, but his presence inside the tent so close to me was too strong to ignore. I heard fabric rustling and peeked at Arnold through my lashes. He was pulling a heavy jacket from out of his backpack and bunching it up to make a pillow.

The temperature wasn’t very low, but it was only going to get colder throughout the night. I watched as he lay his head on his jacket and waited until I was sure he’d fallen asleep to pull my spare blanket over his shoulders.

I turned around and closed my eyes, and very unsuccessfully tried to think of anything but the gorgeous blonde boy sleeping right next to me in the tent.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

I woke up to the sun's rays on my face and the smell of wet grass. A pink blanket was covering my body and keeping me warm. I sat up and turned towards Helga. She was still asleep, but at some point during the night, she had covered me with her blanket.

Moments later, her eyelids fluttered and her eyes opened.

"Good morning." I said.

Helga yawned and rubbed her eyes before heaving herself to a sitting position. She stretched her back and pressed her palm against her hip.

"Did you sleep well?" I asked.

"No," She grumbled. "My back's killing me. I don't understand how people actually enjoy sleeping in a friggin tent." She rubbed her face and then asked, "How did _you_ sleep, football head?"

I smiled as I folded the pink blanket and got up. “Better than I thought I would.”

Her cheeks turned a bright red as her eyes fixed on the blanket. "Yeah, well… I couldn't sleep with all that teeth-chattering going on."

"Thanks, Helga. That was nice of you."

"Don't get all mushy on me okay, football head? Like I said, I was just trying to sleep." She got up and yanked the blanket away from me.

After we finished packing our stuff, we headed down to the lake and sat down under the shade of a tree to eat what food we had left: a couple of apples, a banana, two Kit-Kats and a pack of crackers. Helga pulled a book out to read. I sat there watching people fishing on the other side of the lake and kids playing on the dock.

A while later, Helga was still reading and I was getting bored.

"What are you reading, Helga?" I asked.

She answered without taking her eyes off the book. "What's it to you, football head?"

"I'm bored… wanna do something fun together?"

She lowered her book and finally looked up at me. "Like what, Arnoldo?"

"How’s your ankle?”

"It's fine. Doesn't hurt anymore."

"Then we could go hiking."

"Hiking?" Helga rolled her eyes. "Oh, brother!"

"What's wrong with hiking?"

"Why would  _anyone_  want to walk for hours in the sun, sweat like a pig…  _and_  for no real reason, just to walk  _back_  again? I had enough of that yesterday, thanks!"

"Fine. We could swim in the lake, then."

"We didn't bring our swimsuits, genius!"

"Who said we needed a swimsuit?"

Helga’s cheeks burned red. “I hope you’re not suggesting we go skinny-dipping.”

“W-what?! No!” I felt my own cheeks burning. “I meant we could just swim in our shorts.”

An awkward silence followed and Helga lowered her gaze back to her book, but I knew she wasn’t really reading.

“I brought a deck of cards. Wanna play some poker?”

Helga closed her book and looked up. “Fine, Arnoldo. But let’s make it interesting.”

“Fine by me.” I took the deck of cards out and started shuffling them. “What you wanna bet?”

“How ‘bout ten bucks?”

“I think we can make it more interesting than that.”

“Okay... I’m listening.”

“Winner pushes loser into the lake.”

Helga smirked and held her hand out. “You’ve got yourself a deal, football head.”

I shook her hand and sealed the deal, then dealt the cards.

About an hour went by and we were playing our final betting round.

“What do you have?” Helga asked.

“You show me first.”

“Better start taking off anything you don’t want getting wet, Arnoldo.” She leered and placed her cards on the grass. “Flush.”

“You’re right, Helga. I won’t want you splashing me while I dump you into the lake.” Her gaze was intense as she watched me lower my cards. “Full House.”

“What?! No way!” She started to get up, ready to run. “You cheated, football head!”

I was right behind her. “You know me better than that, Helga.”

She shrieked as I chased her and laughed out loud when I started dragging her to the edge of the lake.

"No, wait!" She tried pulling her arm away. "Arnold, no! Please!”

“A deal’s a deal, Helga!”

“Okay… just… just wait a second.”

I stopped just a few inches from the edge of the lake and let go of her hand, then turned around. “What?”

“Sucker!”

Helga’s hands were suddenly on my chest, pushing me backwards into the lake. I barely had time to grab her and we both fell into the freezing water.

We made it to the surface at the same time gasping for breath.

“What the heck was that?!”

The corners of Helga’s mouth curled up as she swam to the edge.

I followed and watched as she climbed out. Goosebumps were showing all over her arms and legs and her clothes clung to her body.  I’d never really noticed the shape of Helga’s body before, but I noticed it now. Her breasts were perky and full, her nipples standing out tight from the cold. Her waist was small and her hips gave way to long athletic legs. I swallowed hard thinking of what lay beneath.

I didn’t have that much time to contemplate when she plunged into the lake cannonball style creating a huge splash that left me momentarily blinded. I rubbed the water off my eyes and grinned.

"So… How fast can you swim, football head?"

"Race you to the dock?"

She smiled. "You're on."

Time rushed by and when we were finally exhausted, we lay out in the sun for a while to get dry and then headed back to where Grandpa was picking us up. He arrived just in time, and on our way home, we dropped Helga off at her house.

I helped her carry her backpack up the stoop and when we reached the front door, she fitted her key into the lock and glanced up at me. "Thanks, Arnold. I… uhm…" She swallowed, "…I had fun."

I smiled and said, "I had fun, too."

She turned the key and opened the door. "So… uhm… I guess I'll see you tomorrow at school."

"Yeah…"

Her eyes met mine and before I even knew what I was doing, I was already leaning in to kiss her cheek.

"Bye, Helga."

I turned and walked down her stoop to Grandpa's car. When I looked back she'd already closed the door behind her.

"So, Shortman," Grandpa asked as we drove off, "was it as bad as you thought it would be?"

"No… I actually had a great time."

If I hadn't been too busy glancing back at Helga's front door I would've seen the smirk on Grandpa's face.


	2. Arnie Visits Again

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 2 – Arnie Visits Again **

****

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

(Hey, Arnold! Hey, Arnold! Hey, Arnold!)

I stretched my arm out of the bed covers and turned my alarm clock off.  _Why the heck was it ringing on a Saturday?_  I stuck my face in the pillow and tried to fall back to sleep when Grandpa walked into my bedroom.

"Hey there, Shortman! Did you sleep well?"

"Still sleeping, Grandpa."

"No!" He yelled, pulling the covers off the bed. "You should get up and get dressed! Your cousin Arnie will be here any minute now."

_What?! No! I’d completely forgotten he was visiting again._

"Can't you just tell him I'm sleeping, Grandpa?"

"Oh, no! There's no way you're leaving him with me."

I finally sat up on the bed and rubbed my eyes. "I hate hanging out with him."

"Well now, Arnold, I know you don't like him, but he's family!"

"He's just… weird!"

"He'll only be here for two weeks."

"I'm not sure I can handle two weeks, Grandpa." I stretched my arms out and yawned. "And how come  _I'm_  always the one who has to spend time with him?"

"Oh, uhm… well…" Grandpa's eyes flew up to the ceiling, then right then left as he thought of something to say. "Well, because he's very fond of you, you know? You're his  _favorite_  relative!"

I arched an eyebrow. "Yeah right, Grandpa."

I heard his laugh fading as he walked out the door and down the stairs. I got up, put my jeans and a sweatshirt on and headed downstairs. When I walked into the kitchen Arnie was already sitting there, reading the ingredients off a box of cereal.

"Hey, Arnie!"

Arnie looked up from the cereal box and blinked as he always did, with the same dull look on his face.

"Hi."

"How've you been?"

"Fine."

I figured that was as much of a conversation I'd get out of him, so I sat down at the table and served myself a bowl of cereal. Arnie just sat there staring at me, his eyes moving up and down following my spoon as I ate.

"Would you like some?" I finally asked.

"No, thanks. I'm just counting your mouthfuls."

I raised an eyebrow and kept on eating. No point on dallying over anything Arnie said. I finished my cereal – only Arnie knows in how many mouthfuls – and washed the bowl in the sink.

After breakfast, we watched T.V. for a while and then I remembered I'd made plans to meet everyone at  _Dave's Pizza,_  where we usually hung out. I wasn't sure Arnie would want to go, but I figured I'd give it a shot.

"So… Arnie, my friends are going to this pizza place. It's cool… they have some pool tables, darts and arcade games. You wanna go?"

He snorted and rubbed his nose. "Will your friend Helga be there?"

"I guess so."

"Okay."

I grabbed a jacket and a set of keys and headed out the front door.

"We're going to  _Dave's Pizza,_  Grandma! Be back later".

Arnie and I walked in silence the whole way there. I honestly had no idea how to talk to the guy.  We had nothing in common. As we walked into  _Dave's Pizza_ , I could see from the look on everybody's face that we weren't welcome.

All except for Lila's. As soon as she saw Arnie, she smiled and walked right up to us. I couldn't help feeling jealous of Arnie. Yes… after all these years I still had a crush on Lila. I had stopped trying to make her like me like me, but that didn't mean I was over her.

"Hey, Arnie! It's just ever so nice to see you again," Lila said.

Arnie made no response, but glanced above Lila's shoulder looking for someone else – it didn't take a wild guess to know who. When he saw Helga, he walked straight past Lila and went over to stand near the pool table where she was playing.

Helga just gave him a disgusted look and pushed him out of the way to make her shot.

I was about to apologize to Lila on Arnie's behalf when Gerald pulled me aside and whispered in my ear. "What's  _wrong_  with you, man? Why did you bring him? You know nobody likes him!"

_Well,_ not _nobody_ , I thought, as my eyes were still on Lila. "I know, Gerald. But what else was I supposed to do?"

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

"Stop staring at me, you feeble-minded  _weirdo_!" Arnold's stupid cousin kept following me around the pool table every time I tried to get away from him. "And get off my back!"

"I think you're pretty."

"Yeah, yeah! Move out of the way, bucko! It's my turn." I shoved him aside and made my shot, but missed and lost the game.

"Crimeny!"

I heard Sid snickering from across the pool table and felt like breaking his neck.

"You owe me ten bucks, Helga!"

"I want a rematch! Winner takes twenty."

"Are you sure?" he snorted. "You haven't been playing your best."

"I said… I want… _a rematch_!" I slammed my hand on the pool table and Sid hurried to gather the billiard balls for a second game.

We played again, but again I lost. Before Sid could gloat over it, I pulled a twenty out of my back pocket and thrust it into his hand.

"Hey Pheebs… step outside with me for a sec, will ya?" I grasped her arm and pulled her towards the exit. Arnie started following us but I shoved him back inside. "Not you, you  _freak_!"

When we were outside the door, Phoebe tilted her head to one side looking confused. "What's wrong, Helga?"

"What's  _wrong_? What do you mean  _what's wrong_?! Haven't you  _seen_  that creep? He's been following me around everywhere for the last half hour!"

"Gosh, Helga. I'm sure he only means it as a compliment."

"I don't care, Phoebe! I need you to help me get  _rid_ of him!"

Phoebe blinked a few times, still looking confused. "Me? What do you want  _me_  to do, Helga?"

"I don't know! Just distract him while I sneak out or something!"

"Sure thing, Helga." Phoebe smiled, a plan already developing in her mind. "I'm on it."

We went back inside and, as soon as I saw Phoebe distracting him and making him look the other way, I made a run for it.

I didn't stop until I reached the safety of my own bedroom.

Later on, I called Phoebe to ask her how the rest of the afternoon had gone by at the pizza place after I'd left.

The phone rang twice before she answered "Hello?"

"Hey, Pheebs!"

"Oh. Hi, Helga!"

"So, got any news for me? Was the dweep crushed that I left?"

"He kept asking where you'd gone and if you were coming back."

"Oh,  _brother_! Will he ever give up?"

"I don't think so, Helga." There was a pause and then she said, "Someone else also asked about you."

I frowned, wondering who that someone else could be. "Yeah? Who?"

"Arnold."

"A-Arnold asked about  _me_?" I almost fell off the bed. "Why? What did he say?"

"He asked me why you'd left. He seemed disappointed."

"Dis-Disappointed?"  _Arnold was disappointed because I left?_  I couldn't believe it. I felt like I was about to faint.

"Yes. He said he hadn't really spoken to you since last weekend, when you went camping."

"Oh… yeah, well uhm… but what would we have to talk about? I mean, nothing happened…" Things felt weird between Arnold and me since our camping trip, so I’d been kinda avoiding him.

"I don't think he meant talking about something in particular, Helga. Just that he hadn't seen you much lately."

"And… did he say how long the dweep's gonna be staying with him?"

"I'm almost certain he said he was staying for two weeks."

" _Two whole weeks_?!"

The doorbell rang, interrupting our conversation.

"Hold on, Pheebs… Bob! Miriam! There's someone at the door!"

No one answered and it rang again.

"Bob! Miriam!"

There was still no answer.

"Crimeny! I'll have to go get it  _myself_! I'll call you back Pheebs."

I hung up the phone and raced down the stairs to open the door and who else would I find standing there but Arnold's stupid cousin!

" _You_?! What the heck are  _you_  doing here?"

The creep blinked an eye and then the other. "I wanted to see you."

"Well,  _I_ don't want to see  _you_ , so get lost!"

"I brought you a doll made out of lint from my collection." He pulled one of the most disgusting looking things I had ever seen from out of his pocket and handed it out to me.

"Eeeew! That's it!" I grabbed Arnie's arm and pulled him all the way back to Arnold's house and pounded on the front door until someone opened it.

Arnold's grandmother peeked out the door and, when she saw it was me, let it slide wide open. "Oh, Eleanor! How nice of you to drop by!"

"Yeah, yeah… Listen, I'm here to see Arnold. Is he home?"

"Oh, yes. I think you'll find him upstairs in his bedroom."

"Thanks!" I brushed right past her and shoved Arnie’s arm into her hand. “Oh, and I believe  _this_  is yours!"

I stomped up the stairs and stormed into Arnold’s bedroom.

“Helga?!” He jumped up from his desk chair. "What are you doing here? What's up?"

"What's up? I'll tell you what's up, _football head_!" I slammed the door behind me and walked right up to him, shoving my own nose in his face. “I believe you lost something today, and it found its' way to  _my house_!"

Arnold's shoulders sagged. "You're talking about Arnie, aren't you?"

"What else?!"

Arnold ran his hand down his face and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Helga! I got into the shower and by the time I got out, he was already gone."

I took a step closer and dug my finger into his chest. "Listen here,  _Arnoldo_ … He's  _your_  stupid cousin, so I don't care  _what_ you do, but it's  _your_  job to keep him the hell away from me,  _got it_?"

Arnold took a step back, smashing his butt against the desk. "Fine, Helga… I will… I'm sorry. I know how annoying he can be."

"Then for his own good  _and yours_  you better think of something to keep him out of my way!"

I took my finger off his chest and turned around to leave when Arnold's words cut me short.

"I think there might be a way we can get him off your back."

"Yeah? Well, let's hear it then."

"Do you remember his first visit during 4th grade, when you helped me out by trying to make Lila jealous?"

"Yeah…" I crossed my arms, wondering where he was getting at. "What's your point?"

"I'm thinking I could return the favor."

"You mean like pretend we're  _dating_  or something?" I felt my heart beat faster at the thought. 

Arnold's eyes rolled down to the floor as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah…  _something_  like that. I'm sure he'd leave you alone if he thought we were going out."

I couldn't believe it! Was Arnold really offering to be my fake boyfriend? This was a golden opportunity! I could just be nice to him…  _pretend_  to be nice to him… without him ever knowing how I really felt. How could I say no to that?

I narrowed my eyes, as if analyzing the situation, and then stretched my hand out to shake his. "It’s a pact. Whatever it takes to keep your looney cousin off my back."

Just as Arnold's hand joined mine, Arnie walked in. We both turned our heads to look at him and then faced each other again. Arnold discreetly winked at me and pulled me closer to put his arms around me.

"Thanks for bringing my cousin back,  _angel_." He looked at me with fake googly eyes and smiled. "You're the best girlfriend a guy could have."

For a moment, I was left speechless as Arnold's warm body pressed up against mine. "Uhm… yeah... No problem, foo… A-Arnold."

"I didn't know you two were dating."

Arnold pulled slightly away from me and turned towards Arnie. "Yeah… Didn't I mention it?"

"No."

"Well, we've been going out for weeks now. Right, Helga?"

I just nodded. Could you really blame a girl for being speechless? Arnold had just put his arms around me _voluntarily_ and called me his angel. I think I had fantasized about that before over a thousand times.

I was finally able to mentally slap myself back to reality and pull away from him.

"Yeah, well… I gotta run. See ya later, boys."

I stormed out of the room and closed the door behind me, leaning my back against it for a moment. _What the heck had I gotten myself into?_

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

After Helga walked out, I went back to my desk and tried to look busy so Arnie wouldn’t start asking all kinds of questions.

The next day, Gerald, Phoebe, Helga, Arnie, Lila and I were all going to the movie theater. The new thriller ' _Tortured Souls'_  was playing. Gerald and I were the first to arrive, so while we waited for the others I told him about the pact I'd made with Helga.

" _What_?! Are you seriously telling me you're pretending to be Helga G. Pataki's boyfriend for two weeks?!"

"Yes, Gerald. Arnie won't leave her alone. It's the same thing every time he visits."

"Yeah… so?"

"She threatened me to keep him away from her."

"She's  _always_  threatening you, man!" He was right about that. "Why would you let it bother you now?"

"I don't know, Gerald. Just go along with it, okay?"

"Whatever you say, bro. I got your back."

"Thanks."

A while later, everyone had arrived. We bought our tickets and some snacks, and went in to find our seats. Arnie was heading towards the empty seat next to Helga, but I rushed in front of him and got there first. He ended up sitting next to Lila. I tried not to let it bother me and focused on pretending to be Helga’s boyfriend. Gerald and Phoebe sat on the row in front of us.

The lights went out and the movie began. At first, nothing really happened. We were all sitting quietly watching the movie, but then I noticed Arnie glancing at us every few minutes.

“I think I should put my arm around you.” I whispered into Helga’s ear.

“What?” She hissed.

“Arnie keeps looking at us.”

“Oh… right… Ok.”

I reached out and put my arm around Helga’s shoulders. Her body tensed, but after a while, she relaxed a little and leaned in against me.

Her head was resting on my shoulder, just below my chin, and I could smell the shampoo in her hair. It was a fresh sweet lemony scent. What kind of shampoo did she use?

Something happened and Helga jumped up in her seat and spilled my popcorn all over the floor.

“Oh, _crap_! I’m sorry, football head! I-I mean A-Arnold! I’ll go buy you some new popcorn.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.” I chuckled. “Never thought you’d be the kind of girl to get scared over a movie.”

Helga snorted. "Me? _Scared?_ Please! Helga G. Pataki doesn't get scared over a stupid movie."

“Right…” I smirked and leaned in closer to her. “Then how come you just jumped up like that?”

"These movies are  _made_ to make people jump, Arnoldo. That's the whole point. There's a difference between being scared and being startled."

"Whatever you say, Helga."

The movie went on, and we were both starting to relax against each other. At some point during the movie, I noticed I didn’t really know what was going on in the screen. How much of the storyline had I missed while I was looking down at Helga and smelling her hair? Then, I felt more than saw, someone staring at us. When I turned, I noticed it was Lila instead of Arnie watching us. I didn’t really have enough time to see the expression on her face, she looked away so quickly. 

After the movie, we all went to  _Dave's Pizza_ , as usual, and ordered a couple of pizzas. I was trying my best to act like the loving boyfriend I was supposed to be, so as we sat in our booth, I reached out beneath the table and held Helga’s hand in mine. Her hand tensed, but she didn’t pull it away. Her face went white and I could swear she’d stopped breathing.

What the hell was I doing? Arnie couldn’t even see our hands! My own breathing started to change and my heart beat raced. Why was I suddenly feeling so anxious? Should I better let go? I tried pulling my hand away, but it wouldn’t budge.

In the end, it was Helga who pulled her hand away. I stood up and walked over to the counter to order us a couple of drinks and get ahold of myself.

“Hey, Arnold.”

I turned and saw Lila standing right next to me.

"Oh… Hey, Lila. Did you want a drink?"

"No, thank you, Arnold. I just… wanted to ask you something."

"Sure. What is it Lila?"

"What's going on?” She looked confused. “Are you and Helga _dating_?"

"Uhm… yeah. We just started going out."

Lila frowned and I could tell she didn’t believe me. "Look, Arnold… if this is another way of trying to make me jealous…"

"No!" I cut her off. "It's not like that, Lila. I promise."

"But I thought you didn't  _like_  her that way."

"I didn't, but… you know. Things change."

"Yeah, I guess things _do_ change…" Lila's eyes dropped to the floor and her freckled cheeks turned pink. "Well, in that case I'm oh so happy for you, Arnold."

Now I was the one who didn’t believe her. "What's wrong, Lila?"

"I'm not sure… it's just that…" Her eyes met mine for a second and then she looked away. "…seeing you with Helga  _did_  make me feel jealous."

_What?! Had Lila just said she was jealous? About me?_

"But I thought you didn’t like me like me."

"I thought so, too."

"Lila, I… I don't know what to say."

_What was wrong with me?_ The girl I'd had a crush on since like forever was telling me she probably  _did_  like me and I was just standing there, confused and thinking about Helga. Why wasn’t the truth blurting out of my mouth?

Lila shrugged meekly. "It's Okay, Arnold. I guess I'll see you around."

She walked away and then I heard Gerald's voice from behind.

"What the hell, man? Did you just ditch Lila for  _Helga_?"

I was still too confused to understand what had just happened. "I don't know…"

"Just go tell her the truth! She'll understand you were just helping out Helga."

"I-I can't, Gerald."

Gerald couldn't believe what I was saying, and to be honest I couldn't either.

"You're out of your mind, Arnold!"

I was starting to get annoyed and I didn’t know why. "Just forget about it, okay, Gerald?"

“Fine… If that’s what you want.”

We both went back to our booth and joined the rest of our friends. We still hung around for a while, but we had school the next day so we didn’t stay long.

I walked Helga back to her house with Arnie following us close behind. We didn’t speak much on the way. I couldn’t get what had happened with Lila out of my head, and I was still confused about my reaction when I’d held Helga’s hand.

When we reached Helga’s house, Arnie waited for me at the bottom of the stoop and I walked up the stairs to her front door. At the top, I leaned in to kiss her cheek. As I was slowly pulling away from her, our eyes met and held, and for the first time ever I felt completely drawn to her, like an invisible force was pulling me in to kiss her.

I swallowed hard and took a step backwards.

Helga smiled nervously and gently punched my shoulder. The look in her eyes suggested she'd felt it too. "That’s the second time you’ve kissed me at my front door in less than two weeks, football head. Better not make a habit of it."

I smiled nervously too. “As your fake boyfriend, I think I’m entitled to a kiss on the cheek.”

Helga chuckled and said, “Yeah, well… Don’t get used to it. Won’t be for long.”

"Good bye, Helga."

"See ya, Arnoldo."

Arnie didn't go with me to high school every day, so Helga and I only had to pretend we were dating during the weekend and some evenings if we hung out after school.

I had a feeling Lila was starting to suspect something. I told myself I hadn’t come clean with her about me and Helga because I didn’t want her spilling the beans to Arnie, but that wasn’t really true. I knew she could keep a secret. 

Two weeks went by quickly and it was Armies' last weekend in town. Gerald invited Phoebe, Helga, Arnie and me over to his house for a movie marathon.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

_Well, Helga ol' girl, better make the best of it while you still can._ And that's exactly what I did.

I never thought I'd be wishing Arnold's stupid cousin would stay longer. It had been a wish come true pretending to date Arnold for two weeks and just being able to let my guard down without him suspecting how I really felt about him. But of course it had to end sometime.

We were at Gerald's, watching a movie marathon, and I was snuggled close to Arnold, enjoying the soft beating of his heart against my ear and his warm hand resting on my shoulder. I didn't even know what movie was playing on the T.V. and I didn't care.

I breathed in his scent and rejoiced in it. My senses tingled. I slid my hand up his stomach and pulled myself closer to him. I felt his body tense and heard his heart speed up. I knew I was making him feel uncomfortable. _Should I pull away and stop torturing him?_ Nah! This was way too much fun!

The movie was pretty boring, so it wasn’t hard to pretend I’d fallen asleep. I knew Arnold was too much of a nice guy to try to wake me up, so that way I could snuggle close to him as much as I wanted. He would sometimes shift against the couch but always careful not to wake me. _Ha! What a dope!_

After a while, I peeked at Gerald and Phoebe on the other couch and noticed they were getting a little too friendly –if ya know what I mean. _Finally! Way to go, Pheebs!_

Tired of lying on the same side for too long, I squirmed onto my other side, burying my nose in Arnold's chest. A lock of hair fell across my face and a second later, I felt a hand – _Arnold's hand_ – brushing it away. His touch was so gentle my heart paused. Then I felt a gentle tug at my hair as he twirled it around.

A shiver ran down my spine and I stopped breathing. _What the hell was Arnold doing?_ Why was he so adoringly touching my hair? It was suddenly all too much for me to handle and I had to get away.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

The movie was, without a doubt, one of the most boring, slow-paced films I’d ever watched. And I was the only one watching it. Helga and Arnie had both fallen asleep, and Gerald and Phoebe were making out on the couch. I was starting to doze off when Helga shifted to her other side facing me. My eyes unconsciously travelled down to her face. A strand of hair had fallen into her eyes, so I brushed it back behind her ear and drowsily twirled it around my finger.

Helga’s eyes flew open and she suddenly sat up on the couch. She stared at me, her eyes wider than I’d ever seen them.

"W-What time is it?"

"Err… I don’t know."

"I-I should go. It's getting late."

I frowned. Helga never worried about getting home late.

She turned to Phoebe. "Phoebe, we have to go."

Phoebe made no answer, so she grabbed a cushion and launched it across the room, hitting Gerald right on the face.

"Ow! What the heck, Helga!?"

"Phoebe, we have to go." She said again, ignoring Gerald.

"Why, Helga?" Phoebe asked.

"Because… we do, okay? Just, please… could we go now?"

"Okay, Helga, if you really want to go."

Gerald grabbed the keys to his car and we drove them to Helga's house. Helga didn't talk to me all the way there and sat as far away from me as she could on the back seat. I never should’ve touched her hair. Things were starting to get way too awkward between us.

Early the next day, Grandpa and I dropped Arnie off at the bus station and wished him a safe trip home. We were both very happy to see his bus drive away down the road. I’d finally have my room back to myself and things would go back to normal, or at least most things. I had a strange feeling things with Helga would never go back to the way they were before.

The next day, Gerald and I were walking down the stairs after class.

“You must be feeling pretty relieved now that Arnie has left,” He said.

“Yeah. It was nice to wake up in the morning and have my room all to myself again.”

“And you won’t have to pretend to be Helga’s boyfriend anymore. You can now ask Lila to go out with you.”

 

 

"Yeah… I guess I can."

Gerald stopped half way down the stairs and put his hand on my shoulder. "What's up with you, man?"

"What do you mean?"

"You've been acting really weird lately… especially when it comes to Helga."

"I don’t know what you mean." I turned to continue walking down the stairs, but he grabbed my shoulder again and looked me in the eye.

"I'm serious, man… If I didn't know any better I'd say you're falling for her."

" _What_?! Gerald, that's crazy! I could  _never_  fall for a girl like  _Helga_!"

That's what I'd been telling myself for weeks and seriously thought it was true. But why then did the thought of falling for Helga now scare the hell out of me? Trying to convince myself more than Gerald, I went on. "Could you imagine… me and Helga? That could never happen. She only makes my life miserable."

"Well, I'm glad to hear it, bro. That girl could make your life a living hell."

We continued down the stairs and when we got to the bottom, I turned right and crashed right into Helga. Her books spilled all over the floor and we both went on our knees and started gathering them all together.

“I’m sorry, Helga. I didn’t see you.”

When our eyes met for a brief second I thought I saw tears swelling in hers. She didn’t say anything. No _‘watch where you’re going’_ or _‘quit crashing into me all the time, football head’_.

"Helga, are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She accepted the books I handed her. "Listen, Arnold, I… uhm… I just wanted to thank you. You know… for helping me out with the whole Arnie thing."

"You don't need to thank me. I was just…"

"Yeah… I know,” she cut me off. “Just returning the favor. But thanks anyway."

I knew something wasn't right. "What's wrong, Helga? You can tell me." I grabbed her hand and gave it a light squeeze.

"I said I'm fine, football head! Now drop it!" She pulled her hand away and glared at me, now acting a lot more like herself. "You don't need to pretend anymore, Arnoldo! You're off the hook. Now, get out of my way!" She shoved me aside and stomped down the hall.

A voice in my head told me I shouldn’t care, that she was always like that, and that I should just leave her alone. But as I watched her leave, the feeling in my chest was saying something completely different.

I was fighting the urge to run after her and make her tell me what was wrong, when I felt a light tap on my shoulder.

"Arnold, are you listening? Arnold?"

It was Lila.

"What? No, sorry… What were you saying?"

"I was saying I can't believe you lied to me."

"Oh… I'm sorry, Lila. I couldn't tell you the truth. You must think I'm a real jerk for lying to you.”

"Oh no, Arnold! I understand. And although I do think it was wrong of you to lie, I also think it was just ever so nice of you to help a friend."

"Thanks, Lila."

Lila smiled in her usual adoring way and gave my arm a light squeeze. "I guess I'll see you around?"

I just nodded, a forced smile playing on my lips, and she walked back to her classroom.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I was heading up the stairs when I saw Arnold walking down with Gerald. I heard them mention my name so I hid under the stairs and listened.

"…If I didn't know any better I'd say you're falling for her."

Arnold? Falling for  _me_? Why would Gerald think that? My heart pounded hard inside my chest… and then suddenly went to a full stop as I heard Arnold's answer.

"Gerald, that's crazy! I could never fall for a girl like  _Helga_! Could you imagine… me and Helga? That could never happen. She only makes my life miserable."

Everything went silent after that and my mind was a complete blur. I felt a huge pain in my chest that I hadn't felt in a long time. His words kept repeating over and over inside my head…  _could never fall for a girl like Helga… could never happen… never… makes my life miserable…_

I couldn't blame him; I had done this to myself. I had always been mean to him, always bullying him around… What did I expect?

It wasn't the first time I'd heard him say something like that about me, but somehow this time it felt different. This time it really hurt. I guess the fall hurt so much more because I'd let myself fly so much higher. I couldn't move. I couldn't think… I couldn't breathe.

I ran… and crashed into him.

_Crimeny! Would the fuckin' universe ever cut me some slack?_

He knew there was something wrong and I didn't have enough strength to hide it. Count on football head to always try to help. I mustered what little strength I did have and got the hell away from him before I tore myself to pieces standing right there in front of him.

When I got home, I sunk my head in my pillow and let more than a decade of repressed tears roll down my face.

How could I have been so stupid? How could I have let myself hope and dream?

I had always wondered how and when this day would come. The day I'd finally decide it was time to move on. I couldn't keep holding on to something that was just never going to happen. I needed to let go.

I grabbed a box and shoved everything that reminded me of Arnold in it. I had been gathering so much junk over the years. I grabbed all my notebooks full of poems, pulled my pink ribbon off my head, and threw them all into the box. I wished I could rip my heart out and throw it in with everything else.

I knew all the love and pain I felt wouldn't disappear just like that, but I was determined to try.

For a moment, I stood in front of it all, just looking at every single object that represented a part of Arnold, and was surprised it could all fit in a stinkin' box.

I lifted the box up from the floor and headed out the door.

 

**Phoebe's P.O.V.**

I opened the door when I heard the doorbell and found Helga on the other side carrying a box. Her eyes were red and swollen.

"Helga! You've been crying!" I couldn't believe it. I'd never seen her like that in all our years of friendship, and it tore my heart in two.

"I need you to take this, Pheebs." She shoved the box into my hands.

"Sure, Helga. But what is it?"

"It's all my poems and stuff that remind me of Arnold. I can't keep them."

"What's wrong?"

New tears started forming at the corners of her eyes, but she fought to keep them from spilling. "I just need to grow up, Pheebs. I need to move on. I've been obsessing over Arnold for too long… it's time to let go."

"Don't you think you at least owe it to yourself to tell him the truth before giving up? You've never even tried, Helga! Who knows what could happen!"

"I heard him tell Gerald he could  _never_  fall for a girl like me, Phoebe. I don't think I could bear to have him say that to my face. He might not say it with those exact words but the turnout would be the same."

"He doesn't really know you, Helga. Not the  _real_  you... Not the Helga  _I_  know. Don't give up yet. Tell him how you feel, let him know the real you. I just know…"

"No, Pheebs! I'm done! I'm moving on with my life!"

Before I could say anything else, she had turned and disappeared down the street without looking back. I closed the door and carried the box up to my bedroom. I sighed as I placed it on my bed and sat down next to it, feeling like crying myself. I had always wished she would someday muster up the courage to tell him the truth.

Inside the box, on top of everything else, was her pink ribbon lying on an opened notebook. I closed the notebook, set them both on my nightstand, and dug into the box. When I got to the bottom, I realized one important item, probably the most important one, was missing.

_Why had she kept her locket?_

I leaned my head back and smiled faintly. Perhaps there was still a little hope.

 


	3. A Little Too Late

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 3 – A Little too Late **

****

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

While I walked home after school that day, I couldn’t stop thinking about what could’ve made Helga want to cry. She never cried!

When I got home, I grabbed the phone and dialed her number.

“Hello?” Someone answered.

“Mr. Pataki? Hi. It’s Arnold. Is Helga home?”

“Arnold? What Arnold?”

“A friend of Helga’s from school.”

“That blonde kid who’s always hanging around with the boy with tall hair?”

“Uh… Yeah, that’s me.”

“She’s not back from school yet.”

“Oh, okay… Could I just lea-“

Mr. Pataki hung up the phone, so I went upstairs to start working on an assignment. We had a lot going on at school with the upcoming end of the school year. We had papers and essays to write, books to read and finals to study for. I could call her later.

A few hours later, I tried calling her again. Again Mr. Pataki answered.

“Hi, Mr. Pataki. It’s me again. Is-“

“You just missed her.”

“Thanks, I’ll-“

He hung up again.

This time I tried her cellphone. It rang for a while until someone, who wasn’t Helga, answered.

“Uh… Hello?”

It was Mrs. Pataki.

“Hi, Mrs. Pataki. It’s Arnold. Is Helga around?”

“Oh… uhm… She forgot her cellphone. Would you like-“

“Is it that kid again?!” I heard Mr. Pataki say. “Crimeny! Tell him to stop calling!”

“It’s okay, Mrs. Pataki. I’ll just talk to her at school. Thanks!”

I hung up and decided I’d just have to wait until tomorrow.

The next day at school, I looked for Helga everywhere and couldn't find her. When I saw Phoebe talking to a blonde girl in the hallway, I walked over to say hi and ask if she’d seen her.

When the blonde girl turned around, I was surprised to see who she was.

"Helga?" I blinked a few times to check if it was really her.

I hadn’t recognized her, she looked so different. Her hair was down and fell just below her shoulders, but there was something else. It took me a while to figure out what it was until I noticed she’d plucked her eyebrows, and… was that lip-gloss she was wearing?

“You, uhm… You look nice.”

“Thanks, Arnold. Pheebs, we’re late for class.” Helga grabbed Phoebe’s arm and started pulling her away.

Had she just called me _Arnold?_ What happened to football head? And since when was Helga in a hurry to get to class?

The same thing happened later that day, and then every day for the next week. Every time I tried talking to her, she would always make up an excuse and leave. She stopped bullying me around and calling me football head, she didn’t sit behind me in class to throw spit balls at me anymore, she was avoiding me and staying as far away as she could from me, and it was driving me crazy!

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

When I woke up that morning and stood in front of the mirror, I didn’t recognize the Helga staring back at me. I looked at my usual hairdo without my pink bow on top and I felt incomplete. I looked like an incomplete me and I didn’t want to look like that.

I freed my hair of its ponytails and shook it. I needed a change. If I wasn’t going to recognize myself, then I needed to be someone completely different. So, I grabbed a pair of scissors and started cutting. I didn’t really know what I was doing, but I just kept on going. I stared at my eyebrows and started plucking. What could be a bigger change than plucking my one eyebrow?

When I was done, I took a moment to look at myself and sighed. I still felt miserable, but at least now I felt like I was moving forward and making some kind of change. Letting go of Arnold was going to be the hardest thing I’d ever have to do.

I knew Phoebe approved of the change when she said, “Gosh Helga, I love your new look!” when I saw her at school. “Does that mean you’re re-think-“

"No, Pheebs! Sheesh! We already went through this! I'm not telling Arnold how I feel about him. I'm going to  _forge_ t about him. I just needed a change."

The smile disappeared from her face and she sighed. "And how are you planning to forget about him?"

"Easy! I'll just avoid him until I can act sanely around him again."

"And how are you going to avoid him? I mean, we're always hanging out together and he's in most of your classes…"

"I haven't figured it all out yet."

"Well, you better think of something quick, because he's heading this way..."

Before I had a chance to react and get the hell away from there, I heard his voice from behind.

"Hey, Phoebe. Have you seen Helga? I…”

I turned around and saw his eyes widen as he looked at me and then blink a few times. The stupid football head hadn't even recognized me.

He told me I looked nice and I felt a longing growing in my heart. I couldn't even look him in the eye without feeling a heavy weight on my chest. I looked away and the next thing I knew, I was pulling Phoebe down the hall.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

By the end of the week, I was convinced that Helga had some kind of problem with me. I was the only one who she was acting weird around. At first, I thought she just felt uncomfortable after everything that had happened between us. But then I realized that wasn’t it. She seemed mad at me for some reason, and I had no idea why.

During the few classes we shared, she would always sit behind me and bug me the whole time. Now, she sat as far away from me as she could and never even looked at me. I never thought I'd say this, but I missed her bullying me around. It was a whole lot better than her avoiding me. I missed her and I needed to find out what I'd done to push her away like that. I had to find a way of make her talk to me.

So, one day after class, when she’d stayed behind everyone else looking for something in her backpack, I took my chance. I waited until everybody else had left the classroom and closed the door. Helga looked up at the sound of the door closing and in a panic started shoving her books in her backpack. When she finally headed for the door, I blocked her way.

She glared at me. "What do you want, Arnoldo?"

"I want to talk to you."

"I can't. I'm late for my next class." She tried sidestepping me but I grabbed her arm.

"What the hell?! Let go of me, football head!"

I let go of her arm but didn’t move away. "I really need to talk to you, Helga. You've been avoiding me all week, and I wanna know why."

"What? No, I haven't."

"Yes, you have. What did I do to you, Helga? You won't even look at me…"

She remained silent for a few moments, her eyes staring down at the floor. When she did speak, her voice slightly broke. "Nothing! You've done  _nothing_  to me… Now get out of my way…"

"No… Helga, look at me." I tried lifting her chin up with my finger but she wouldn't let me and I saw a tear roll down her cheek. "Helga…?"

I took a step closer and tried putting my arms around her but she shoved them away. "Don't. Don't touch me."

"Just tell me what's wrong."

She dropped her things on the floor, brushed away the tear and looked me in the eye. "What the hell do you care,  _football head_? This is none of your business!"

"It's my business if you won't talk to me! I just wanna help."

She snorted and folded her arms across her chest. "Arnold… always tryin’ to help. Always there to the rescue. Well, I don't need your stupid help. I don't need your pity, football head!"

"I don't pity you, Helga! Geez! … I just want to know what's wrong… what happened. What did I do? You're like a friggin' jigsaw puzzle, Helga! One day you're bullying me around, annoying the crap out of me… the next you're being nice to me and laughing  _with_  me… and now you won't even talk to me!"

More tears swelled in her eyes and her breathing grew heavy and uneasy. "Just leave me alone, Arnold. I can't…"

"What? You can't what, Helga?"

Her chest heaved and the tears she'd been holding back spilled from her eyes.

_What the hell was I doing_ , cornering her like this, making her cry? I never even thought I could make her cry. Helga, who was always so strong, so sure of herself…

I took another step and pulled her closer to wrap my arms around her. She tried pushing me away again but this time I held her tighter and she didn't seem to have the strength to fight me. She shivered and I felt warm tears dampen my shirt near the crook of my neck.

Her trembling hands slid up my back and clasped onto me. All I could hear in the stillness of the empty classroom were Helga's uneven breaths and the heavy beating of my heart in my ears. I leaned in closer to the side of her face and whispered, "Helga…  _please_  tell me what's wrong so I can make it right."

She shook her head and dropped her arms, letting go of me. I slid my hands to the sides of her face and wiped away her tears with my thumbs. "Please… tell me."

She finally looked up at me with her watery eyes and I felt my heart crumble into pieces as the world around us fell to the ground.

I knew then, from that moment, that I would do anything, give anything, to never see her eyes like that again. I couldn't lie to myself anymore. I couldn't keep pretending it wasn't there… It had haunted me for weeks, nagging at the back of my head, pulling at my heart. And I'd just ignored it, denied it… but it was time to face the truth, no matter how irrational it might be…

… I'd fallen for Helga… and I'd fallen hard and heavy.

I swallowed hard trying to wash down the lump that had formed in my throat and I couldn't move. I felt completely numb all over. When she pulled away from me, I no longer had the strength to stop her.

"You didn't do anything wrong, Arnold. I just need you to leave me alone."

She picked up her things from the floor and walked out of the classroom, leaving me standing there looking at the opened door, my heart beating so fast I thought it might leap out of my chest. When I felt I could move again, I sat down on the chair closest to me and buried my face in my hands.

_How the hell had this happened and what was I supposed to do with this now?_

After school, Gerald came over to the boarding house to study for a final, but I obviously couldn't concentrate. My mind was too busy trying to figure out what the heck was going on in my life. Not only had I just realized I'd developed strong feelings for my all-time bully, but she was also not talking to me and wouldn't tell me why.

"What's up, man? You seem kinda distracted."

My eyes readjusted from staring at a blank spot on the wall and I turned to Gerald. "It's nothing… I just have something on my mind and I don't know what to do about it."

Gerald narrowed his eyes at me and dropped the book he was holding on the bed. "Talk to me, bro. What is it?"

I wasn't sure I wanted to discuss this with Gerald. I didn't think he'd understand. But if I couldn't talk to him about it, then who else could I talk to?

"It's… complicated."

"So it's about a girl."

I nodded.

He smiled. "But it's not Lila…"

I shook my head. "No… It's someone else."

"Just spill it out, man!"

I took a deep breath trying to mentally prepare myself for the blow and let it out. "It's Helga… I think I may have feelings for her, Gerald." Gerald just sat there looking at me as calm as ever, waiting for me to say something else. "What? Don't you have anything to say after what I just told you?"

He shrugged his shoulders and smirked. "I'm proud of you, man. I was wondering when you'd finally spill the beans."

"You mean you knew about this?"

"Arnold, I know you better than anyone! I've known for a while."

"W-What? B-But … how?"

"You've been pining over her for weeks! Every time she's been near you you've had that stupid look on your face."

I rubbed my hands along my face. "What the hell am I going to do about this, Gerald? I mean… how could I fall for  _Helga_?"

"I don't know, man. I mean… talk about being a masochist. As far as we know, she hates you!"

"She doesn't hate me, Gerald."

"Then how come she's always being mean to you and saying how much she hates your guts? Face it, Arnold… she's nothing but a bully."

"That's not all she is, Gerald. She's not all bad."

"Really? Have you forgotten everything she's put you through? All the times she's humiliated you and called you names? What about that prank she played on you… pretending to be Cecile? You were upset about that for weeks after you found out!"

I winced at the memory of that day years ago when I'd found out who the mysterious girl playing Cecile had been. I always knew she looked too familiar and had even thought she looked a lot like Helga, but I had let it go thinking I was crazy to think that.

The day I found out, we had gone to Helga's house to work on an assignment and I'd accidentally found the other pair of her shoes in a box beneath her bed. When I confronted her about it she laughed at my face saying she'd played a prank on me and called me a dope for not figuring it out sooner.

"I know… but –"

"I just don't want you to get hurt, man."

"I'm telling you Gerald, there's a lot more to her."

"Okay then… Enlighten me."

"I don't know… I mean… she might not be the prettiest girl I know, but she has these big blue eyes… She's smart… She's strong and independent, and she doesn't care what people think about her. She isn't afraid to speak her mind and even though she hides it pretty well, I know she's a good person and takes care of the people she loves…" I paused and thought for a second. "She has a bad temper, I know, but she's also kind and has a big heart if you look close enough… She's always building up walls, but that's because she's had to learn to be that way. The truth is… she's one of a kind. I know it's insane… of all the girls I know, I had to fall in love with the one that _literally_  drives me crazy."

"Man, Arnold! You've got it bad, lover boy!" Gerald gave me a pat on the back.

I felt beaten and hopeless. "What am I going to do, Gerald?"

"You could just try telling her how you feel."

"I'm not sure if I should. A girl like Helga?"

"If you really feel so strongly about her, you have to tell her. Otherwise, you'll just end up wondering what could've happened. She might turn you down – and odds are _she will_ – but at least you'll know."

The following Saturday we were all hanging out at  _Dave's Pizza,_  as usual, and I still hadn't made up my mind about telling Helga. She still wasn't talking to me and avoided any kind of eye contact, but at least she could be in the same room with me. If I thought I felt awkward around her before, now that I'd actually said how I felt about her out loud, I was nervous in a whole new level. I didn't even know how to talk to her anymore – not that she'd listen to me anyway.

Gerald and I were playing a game of foosball while Helga and Phoebe stood nearby watching and waiting for their turn to play, when some guy playing at a nearby pool table got shoved into Helga by one of his friends and spilled the soda she was holding all over her shirt.

"What the hell! Watch where you're going, moron!" She yelled.

"Oh shit!" He said, half laughing. "I'm so sorry. Are you okay? My friend just –"

"No, I'm not okay. You just spilled my fuckin' drink all over me!"

"Geez, I'm sorry…" He grabbed a napkin from a table and started wiping her t-shirt.

She shoved his hands away and backed away. "Get your hands off me, you creep."

"Wow! You're a handful. I was trying to help…"

"If you want to help, just get the hell out of my sight!" She pushed him out of her way and headed for the restroom. Phoebe followed close behind.

Not long after Phoebe and Helga had come back, the same guy came up to us with a new soda in his hand and offered it to Helga.

"I felt bad about spilling yours, so I bought you a new one."

Helga glared at him but took the soda anyway. "Well, it was the least you could do after being such an ass."

The guy chuckled, clearly amused. "I apologized – when it wasn't even really my fault – bought you a new soda, got insulted more than once and  _I'm_  the ass?"

"Well, if you don't like getting insulted, what the heck are you still doing here?"

The grin didn't leave his face as he stepped closer. "Actually, I was thinking I could join you for a game of foosball."

Helga's eyes narrowed as she considered his offer and then shrugged her shoulders moving to the other side of the foosball table. "Care to make it interesting?"

He held his hand out for a handshake. "I'm Jeremy by the way."

Helga didn't take his hand; instead she dropped the ball in the center of the foosball table and grabbed the handles on her side. "Helga."

For the next couple of hours all I did was watch them joke around and challenge each other game after game.

Jeremy seemed like a decent enough guy, but I hated him instantly. I hated the way he grinned and looked at Helga. I hated the way he took every chance he got to touch her. But most of all I hated how she obviously felt such at ease with him, like she could just be herself. I'd known her most of my life, always been nice to her, tried to be her friend and I'd never been anything but a stupid football head to her.

"Wipe that look off your face, man!” came Gerald's voice from behind.

"I can't Gerald. It's driving me crazy! She's obviously into this guy… and she won't even _look_ at me!"

"Standing around watching them and getting all jealous won't help. Come on, let's go sit and I'll buy you a drink."

He grabbed my shoulder and practically dragged me to the table where everyone else was sitting, but it didn't help much. I couldn't see them anymore but that didn't mean I couldn't think about them, and what Rhonda said next just put the cherry on the top.

"I can't believe Jeremy seems interested in  _Helga_! I mean she's _such_ a tomboy! And he's  _so cute_ … way out of her league. I've seen him around school. He's a senior and he's in the foot-ball team…"

That did it for me. I stood up and walked out the door. I sat down on the bench just outside, leaned my head back and took a deep breath.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

It was the first time I'd had some fun in over a week. This Jeremy guy was turning out to be pretty okay. He was a pompous snob, but he was also good looking, had a great sense of humor and was up for a challenge.

But at the end of the day he was just… not Arnold.

Arnold… _Crimeny_! What a freakin' mess I'd made of everything! How I missed him! Every time I'd caught him watching me with those stupid puppy eyes of his during the last week I'd felt my resolve crack bit by bit. How long would I be able to keep this up?

I looked above Jeremy's shoulder just to see if I could catch a glimpse of him and saw he was gone. I finished that last foosball game and walked over to our table, hoping to find him there but Phoebe said he'd left about ten minutes ago. I suddenly didn't feel like hanging out anymore, so I decided to head back home and said good bye.

I wasn't looking up as I pushed the door to get out, so I didn't see whose face I had just slammed against the glass door until I heard him groan and mutter a curse. I looked up and saw him covering his nose with one hand.

"A-Arnold! Are you okay? I'm so-o… I mean… What the hell are you doing standing outside a friggin' door, football head?"

"I wasn't just standing outside the door, Helga. I was about to walk in when you slammed it into my face!"

"I… err… I thought you'd left."

"No…" Our gazes met and held for a long time. It felt like ages since I'd seen his eyes. I'd forgotten what a perfect shade of green they were, and they seemed so surprised that I was looking back at them. "Were you leaving?"

"Yeah…"

"Let me walk you home."

"No… thanks. I can walk home by myself." I turned my back to him and headed down the street. I hadn't gotten very far when I heard heavy footsteps catching up with me.

"Come on, Helga. We don't have to talk. I promise I won't say anything."

I just shrugged and kept on walking at a slower pace letting him keep up with me. We walked the whole way to my house in complete silence. I thought I felt him watching me more than once but I didn't dare find out. When we reached the stoop to my house, his hand took my wrist before I walked up the steps.

"Helga, I…"

I shook my head and gave him a warning look. "You promised, football head."

He smiled and pursed his lips and I wished he hadn't. He let go of my wrist and waved his hand as I walked up the steps to my front door. I opened the door and stepped inside, but before closing it, I looked back and watched him leave.

_Stupid football head!_

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

I walked back home with the biggest smile on my face. She wasn't exactly talking to me again, but at least she'd let me walk her home.

I thought about it for the rest of the weekend and decided I just had to tell her how I felt. So, on Monday after school, I found myself sitting on a bench just outside the school gates waiting for her to come out and mentally preparing myself for the craziest thing I’d ever do. Odds were she’d laugh in my face, but really, what did I have to lose? Something told me that if I could just reach out for the Helga I knew was there buried inside, she just might give me a chance.

"What's up, man? What are you still doing here? Why haven't you gone home?"

"I'm waiting for her, Gerald."

"Who? _Helga?_ " He moved to sit next to me on the bench.

"Yeah. I've been thinking about what you said, and you're right. I should tell her."

"And you're doing it  _now_?"

"Yeah… Why not? I need to get it off my chest. And if she's going to blow me off I'd rather she do it now."

"And what are you gonna say?"

"I don't know. Whatever comes out."

"That's brave, Arnold!"

We finally saw her walking outside and I stood up, taking a deep breath.  _Here goes nothing._ I heard Gerald wish me luck as I started walking towards her trying to look more confident than I felt. With every step that brought me closer to her, I grew more nervous. My palms started to sweat and my heart pounded harder.

_What the hell was I doing? What was I going to say?_

I paused for a brief second momentarily backing down, but as I took another deep breath I felt my determination coming back. I took another step closer and just as I was about to call out to her, someone else shouted her name.

"Helga!"

I followed her gaze as she looked the other way and saw Jeremy running towards her. He finally reached her and stopped to catch his breath. I couldn't hear what they were saying from where I was standing and I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do, so I just stood there feeling like an idiot waiting for him to go away.

After a while, I saw him reach for the backpack she was carrying and lead her to a car that was parked on the other side of the road. He held the door open for her as she got in and ten seconds later, they were gone.

I felt a tight reassuring grip on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, man."

"I should've told her sooner."

"Don't give up yet, though. A little competition never hurt anyone."

"Trust me… I won't."

I knew it was a long shot. Helga had never given me any real reason to believe she could ever see me as anything but a stupid football head, but I had a feeling I wouldn't be wasting my time if I tried.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I was counting the minutes for my last class to end, hoping a meteor would just fall from the sky and take my precious life so I wouldn't have to hear another word coming out of Mr. Harris's mouth, when the bell finally rang.

As I raced down the stairs desperate to get away from school, I heard an unfamiliar voice calling me. I looked around and saw Jeremy from the pizza place running towards me. I rolled my eyes.  _Great! What did he want now?_

He soon caught up with me and paused to catch his breath. "Helga, I've been looking all over for you." He said, between breaths.

"Well, you found me. What do you want?"

He grinned and straightened his back reminding me of how much taller he was. "I was wondering if you'd like to hang out with me sometime…"

I narrowed my eyes at him and cocked my head to one side. "Are you asking me out… like on a date?"

"Yeah… you could say that."

I snorted and rolled my eyes again. "Oh, brother."

"I'm sure I could show you a good time."

"I don't think so, pretty boy!"

I was about to walk away when he grabbed my shoulder. "Give it a try. We had fun the other day, didn't we? ...What do you have to lose?"

I shoved his hand away and crossed my arms. "Nothing. I'm just not interested."

A half-smile touched his lips and he leaned in closer. "I'm sure I could change your mind."

I arched an eyebrow, a little impressed by his overconfidence. "Look, bucko… I don't know if you've noticed, but I don't hang out with dudes like you… and I'm pretty sure I'm not the kind of girl you usually go out with."

"I know. That's why I like you." I still wasn't convinced but I had to admit hearing him say he liked me wasn't half bad. "At least let me give you a ride home… and you can decide on the date later."

He pulled my backpack off my shoulder and I followed him into his car. "Don't get any ideas. I still think you're a bigheaded stuck up snob."

He laughed and climbed in through the other side of the car. "I wouldn't dare."

 


	4. I'll Miss You

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 4 – I'll Miss You **

****

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

Our junior year of high school was finally over.

"Man, it feels great to say good-bye to school for a couple of months!" Gerald said, as we walked down the stairs from school. "No more studying, no more essays, no more listening to Mrs. Brawley…"

 “Actually, I think I’m going to miss it.” Phoebe cut in.

“Yeah, no kiddin’ Phoebes! We’d never have time off school if it were up to you.” Helga sneered.

Gerald grabbed Phoebe’s hand and pulled her into a hug. “The only thing I’m going to miss about school is you.” He kissed her.

Gerald and Phoebe had officially started going out, and now that they spent most of their time together, Helga and I would tag along. Things still felt awkward between us, which is why I’d decided to wait a little longer to tell her how I felt, but at least she was talking to me again.

 “I’m gonna miss school too, Phoebes.” I agreed.

“Yeah right, football head.” Helga said. “I’m pretty sure school’s what you’ll be thinking about while you’re lying around in the beach eating _ceviche_.”

I was spending summer break in Costa Rica with my grandparents and Gerald.

“What are you doing this summer, Helga?”

“Nada! I’m going to be stuck here all summer with Olga and her stupid husband.”

Olga had gotten married four years ago to a guy named Andrew. He was the typical man any woman would want to marry: tall, good looking and rich. Helga obviously hated him, but he was in fact a pretty nice guy. They had two kids: Andrew Jr. who was almost three years old and Jazlyn, barely nine months old. Helga was always going on about how annoying they were but the truth is she secretly adored them.

"So… are we in for tonight?" Gerald asked. "I heard this party's gonna be W-I-L-D Wiiiild!"

Peapod was having a huge party at his place downtown to celebrate the end of the school year and apparently the whole school was going. We were leaving early the next day, so this was the last night the four of us could hang out together.

"I don't know, Gerald. We’re leaving pretty early tomorrow and – Ow!"

Helga's fist punched my shoulder. "Oh, c'mon football head! You could use a wild night."

I could never understand how a girl who looked that skinny could punch so hard. "Fine… I guess we could –”

"Great!” Gerald said, and leaned in to kiss Phoebe. “So, I guess we’ll see you two ladies tonight."

When Phoebe put her arms around Gerald for a more intimate kiss, Helga and I glanced at each other uncomfortably.

I rubbed the back of my neck. "So, uhm… Phoebe's house at nine?"

"Sounds like a plan."

As soon as I got home, I started packing for Costa Rica. Then I took a quick shower and, after rummaging through my whole closet, finally picked out a clean plain white shirt and a brown jacket, and sprayed some cologne on.

While I walked down the stairs ready to leave, Grandpa looked at me slyly.  

"Well, look at you… all bright and shiny! Who are you trying to impress?"

Warmth crept up my face. "No one, Grandpa."

He leered at me. "Are you done packing? We're leaving early tomorrow. Don't stay out too late."

"I won't, Grandpa. And yeah, I'm all set."

"It's going to be so much fun! Your Grandma and I spent our honeymoon there, you know? When we –"

"Grandpa, could you please tell me about it tomorrow? I'm already running a bit late."

"Go on, then. Have fun!"

I headed towards the door.

"Oh… And, Arnold?"

I turned around.

"Good luck!" He winked.

My face turned red again. "Thanks, Grandpa!"

It was 9:15 when I knocked on Phoebe's door. I glanced down at my shoes and waited for someone to answer the door. When I heard the doorknob turn, I looked up and saw Helga on the other side.

My insides went warm and my heart skipped a beat. She was standing in the doorway, her hand still clutching the door, wearing a little black dress that would’ve made any teenager's heart jump up and down. She looked stunning, almost as tall as me, with a pair of high heels on. My mouth went dry.

"Where's tall hair boy? Why isn't he with you?"

I swallowed hard and opened my mouth. "Err… He, uhm… He said something about picking up Sid and Stinky on his way."

"Hm… Well, Phoebe's not ready yet anyway, so… Do you wanna come in?"

I barely nodded and she moved aside to let me in. When she closed the door behind us, we both stood there in the hallway not knowing what to say to each other.

"She might be a while. Do you wanna sit down?" She finally said.

Again, I just nodded.

Helga grabbed a magazine that was lying around and sat down on the couch pretending to read it. I sat on the couch across from her and tried to focus on anything but her long athletic legs. I hadn't noticed how long I'd been staring at her until our eyes met and I quickly looked away. I could tell we were both relieved when Phoebe finally walked down the stairs.

A while later, Gerald arrived with Sid and Stinky. As we were getting into the car, Stinky held out his hand to help Helga get in. "Gosh, Helga, you're looking awfully pretty tonight. Looking all ladylike and all."

Helga's cheeks turned pink and she glared at Stinky. "Get the hell out of my way, you dweeb!" She pushed his hand aside and climbed in. I climbed in after her.

Gerald's car was one of those mini compact ones, so Sid, Stinky, Helga and I had to squeeze in in the back.

"Move over, you morons! I can feel the freakin' arm rest pressing into my ribs!"

"Where the heck do you want us to move, Helga?" Sid glared. "There's no fuckin' room!"

"Well, maybe if someone hadn't –"

"Y-You can sit on my lap if you want." I offered.

"What?! I'm not sitting on your lap, football head!"

Stinky's head popped out to look at Helga. "I reckon we'd all be a lot more comfortable if you did."

"There's no way in hell –" Gerald made a quick turn that made us all crush up against Helga. "Ow! What the heck, tall hair boy?! Learn how to drive will ya! Crimeny!"

I saw Gerald smirk through the rear view mirror and I knew he'd done it on purpose.

"Fine! I'll sit on football head's stupid lap!"

Helga moved to sit on my lap and Sid and Stinky repositioned themselves on the backseat. Now I was the one feeling uncomfortable. Having Helga this close to me was making me sweat and causing all kinds of weird stuff in my stomach. I stared out the window and tried to think of anything else.

Suddenly, Gerald hit a bump on the road and my arms instinctively wrapped around Helga's waist. She yelled at Gerald for being a lousy driver and, instead of shoving my arms away like I expected her to, she leaned in closer to me. My heart started racing. I wasn't sure if I should take my arms away from her or keep them wrapped around her waist. I could feel the tension in her body, so why wasn't she pulling away?

We finally made it to Peapod's house, and the whole place was crowded. We eventually found Rhonda, Nadine, Harold and a bunch of our other friends on the deck.

Rhonda's eyebrows flew skyward as her eyes swept over Helga. "Well, well, well… What do we have here? Could it really be  _Helga G. Pataki_?" She sneered. "Jeremy must've had a big influence in you if you've finally decided to leave your jeans and sweatpants at home."

Helga's hands clenched into fists as she glared at Rhonda. "Doesn't matter what I'm wearing,  _Princess_ … I could still beat the crap out of you! Dress or no dress… So you better keep your big mouth shut if you know what's good for ya."

Rhonda rolled her eyes and waved a dismissive hand. "Clearly you will never be  _anything_  but a tomboy, Helga. And no change of outfit will  _ever_  change that."

Helga continued to glare at her as Rhonda stuck her nose up in the air and turned towards Nadine.

I took a step closer to Helga and whispered into her ear, "Don't listen to Rhonda."

Helga snorted and shrugged, pretending not to care. "When have I ever listened to  _anything_  little miss no-brained princess over there has to say?"

"I know… I'm just saying you're great just the way you are, Helga. Like you said, it doesn't matter what you're wearing… you're still you… and…"

"And what?"

"And I like you that way." Helga's eyes grew very wide and then she frowned. "You do look very beautiful tonight, though."

"Err… Thanks. You, uhm… you don't look so bad yourself, football head."

"So, ladies…" Gerald said, "Can we get you something to drink?"

Phoebe smiled. "I'd just like a soda, please."

"And anything with alcohol for me," said Helga.

"Okay. Coming up." Gerald nudged me forward and we went to get some drinks.

The house was so cramped it took us ages to get to the bar. As we squeezed our way through, Gerald looked back at me and said, "Tonight's the night, Arnold!"

"The night for what?"

"What do you mean  _for what_?! For telling Helga, of course!"

"I don't know Gerald. I was planning something a little more –"

"Why not? Think about it, man! We're leaving tomorrow, so if she blows you off, you'll have the whole summer to get over her. You'll meet some cute  _Latina_ , and –"

"And what if she doesn't blow me off?"

"I'm sorry to tell you, but I wouldn't count on it, bro…  _But_  if she  _didn't_  blow you off, I guess you'd just see her when we get back. No big deal."

As we headed back to the deck, I couldn't stop thinking about what would happen if she said yes. What would it be like if Helga and I actually dated? I'd thought about how I'd tell her and I'd fantasized about what it would be like to kiss her -we'd kissed before a long time ago, but I meant  _really_  kiss her - but I hadn't given much thought to what would happen if she said yes.

Maybe I should just get it over with… Just tell her how I felt about her and see what happened. Crazier things had happened… hadn't they? What if she felt the same way?

I stopped dead on my tracks when we reached our friends. Jeremy was there, hovering over Helga. What was he telling her that he needed to lean in so close to her?

"So," Jeremy said, "Are you guys having fun? Didn't think I'd find  _you_  here…" He looked directly at me as he put an arm around Helga. "I'm really glad you came, Helga. And I have to say you're looking  _smokin' hot_  tonight!"

Helga half smiled and nudged Jeremy in the ribs. There was no  _'shut up, moron!'_ or  _'get your hands off me'_  and I felt a stab of jealousy. I looked away and tried my best to ignore it.

After a while, Sid and Stinky came back carrying a tray of shots and offered us one each. I took mine and sniffed the strong alcohol in it. "What is it?"

Stinky just shrugged. "Beats me! But it sure looks fun to drink."

Helga was about to gulp hers down when I reached out and stopped her. "I'm not sure we should drink it if we don't even know what it is."

"Oh, c'mon football head! Lighten up!" She pushed my hand away and drank it in one quick gulp, keeping her eyes tightly shut as it slid down her throat. When she opened her eyes again she grinned and reached out to push the shot glass I was holding up to my mouth. "Don't be such a baby! It's not that bad!"

"Don't be so hard on him." Jeremy smirked. "Maybe it's too strong for him to handle."

_What was the deal with this guy?_

Taking the challenge, I placed the shot glass against my lips and, throwing my head back, poured it down my throat. It burned the whole way down.

Helga chuckled and was about to say something when Jeremy leaned to whisper something into her ear and pulled her away.

I saw Jeremy's hand slide into Helga's as they walked away and disappeared into the crowd.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

This whole summer was going to suck big time!

I knew I should be glad that Arnold was going away cause then I wouldn't have to see him every day, but I couldn't help the way I felt. Avoiding and ignoring him had gotten me nowhere. He just wouldn't give up! It suddenly seemed like everywhere I looked there he was with his adorable football-shaped head. And now that Phoebe was spending every freakin' second with Gerald, if I wanted to hang out with them, Arnold just came in with the package. Staying away from him was just… impossible!

All I wanted to do was curl up in a hole in the ground and hibernate through summer… But instead here I was at a party at Peapod's place with Jeremy and his friends.

I wasn't sure how it had happened. One moment I was playing Beer Pong and laughing my head off with Jeremy's friends, the other I was trying to stand up from a chair and the whole world was spinning around me. I would've collapsed on the floor if it hadn't been for Jeremy's arm around my waist.

He grinned and steadied me on my feet. "I think you should lie down for a while."

I shook my head. "No. I need to find Phoebe."

"Let me take you upstairs so you can lie down and then I'll go look for her."

"Go… upstairs… with  _you_?" I asked, slurring every word.

He chuckled and draped my arm around his shoulders, keeping his tightly around my waist. "I promise nothing will happen if you don't want it to."

Feeling dizzy and a little disoriented, I let him lead me upstairs. When we got to the top, he opened the first door on the right and we walked in on a couple of horny teenagers making out on the bed. The guy threw a pillow at us as we burst out laughing and Jeremy closed the door.

"Lock the door, you nimrods!" I yelled.

Still laughing, Jeremy dragged me to the next empty room, which was some kind of studio, and helped me onto the couch.

He sat down beside me. "You never drink much, do you?"

"Nope."

Jeremy moved his arm to the backrest of the couch behind my head. "Then why did you drink so much tonight?"

"Can't a girl just try to have some fun?"

"Yeah… I just kinda got the feeling you’re trying too hard…"

I shrugged and looked away. "I don't know… I guess I just wanted to get some stuff off my mind."

"What  _stuff_?"

"That's none of your business."

He chuckled and moved a bit closer. "I might be able to help." When I just shook my head, he went on. "Then at least tell me why you accepted my invitation. I didn't think you'd come."

"I didn't. My friends wanted to come."

"Okay… Then why did you just spend all night with  _me_ ,  _away_  from your friends?"

"You ask too many questions."

Again he chuckled and pushed a strand of hair out of my face, causing a tingling sensation to run down my spine. "Fine… Then  _you_  try asking  _me_  something for a change."

I stared back at him for a moment and asked what I'd been wondering since the first time we'd met. "Why do you like me?"

He thought about it for a second and then finally said, "I guess it's because I've never met anyone like you. You're unpredictable… and interesting." His hand moved up to cup my cheek and my heartbeat started racing. "And you have no idea how gorgeous you are, which makes you even more attractive."

A moment later, he was pulling my head closer and pressing his lips against mine.

He kissed me gently at first, nibbling softly, urging my lips apart. When I opened my mouth, he slid his tongue inside, exploring. I finally kissed him back, meeting him stroke by stroke.

I couldn't breathe… I couldn't think… My heart was beating so fast. I pulled my mouth away from his to catch my breath and clear my mind. Everything was spinning and I wasn't sure I could blame it entirely on the alcohol.

His lips moved impatiently down my neck, licking and tasting his way down to the spot where my pulse pounded. He leaned over me until I was forced to sink onto the couch and he was lying on top of me, his hips pressed hard against mine. His mouth moved slightly lower. I felt his hand reach up to cup my breast and my body throbbed from his touch, the sensation completely new and unknown.

I knew I had to end whatever was going on. But as I fought to say the words, his hands moved all over the place causing all sorts of tremors and shivers to run down my body.

My mind went blank…

And then suddenly, as my eyes drifted close, it was  _Arnold's_  hands touching me, Arnold's lips kissing me… but through the daze of the moment a nagging voice kept telling me something was wrong… that this wasn't right.

I opened my eyes and came back to reality. _What the hell was I doing?_

With a hard shove, I pushed Jeremy away from me and stumbled off the couch.

Jeremy looked up at me, his breath coming in short ragged gasps and the evidence of his arousal visible through his jeans. "I'm sorry," he breathed, "am I going too fast?"

"No." I said, trying to bring my own breathing back to its normal rhythm. "It's just that…" I looked him in the eye and shook my head. "…I can't do this."

"Is something wrong?" He frowned as he pulled himself up from the couch.

"Yes… No! I don't know…" I sat down on the couch again and buried my face in my hands. When would the image of Arnold stop haunting me?

"Who is he?"

"Who?"

Jeremy narrowed his eyes and stared at me. "The guy you're thinking about…"

"What? I'm not thinking about  _anyone_!"

"C'mon Helga… you don't have to lie to me." He looked away for a moment and then back at me. "It's that blonde kid you're always calling football head, isn't it?"

"A-Arnold?! No! … I don't even  _like_  him!" I lied, feeling my face turn red.

"So now he's  _Arnold_ …" He mocked. "What do you even see in that guy? He's a freakishly shaped nerd!"

My blood boiled up inside and I leaped up from the couch. "Arnold is  _not_  a nerd!" I snapped at him. "And he's not freakishly shaped!"

"Then how come you're always calling him  _football_ head?"

I pushed him hard against the door and thrust my finger into his chest. "That's none of your  _bloody_ business!"

"Fine," he said, moving my hand away from him. "Whatever."

He stormed out of the room and slammed the door behind him. I sunk back into the couch feeling the nausea sinking in when I heard my cellphone vibrating on the floor. I picked it up and saw I had at least a dozen missing calls from Arnold and Phoebe, along with a text message from Arnold that read: ‘Helga, where are you? We've been looking for you everywhere!’

Feeling an instant pain in my chest, I buried my face in one of the cushions on the couch and closed my eyes hoping no one, especially Arnold, would ever find me.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

Helga had left with Jeremy hours ago and we hadn't seen her since. It was getting close to Phoebe's curfew and we were starting to get worried.

We started looking for her and eventually found Jeremy playing beer pong with a group of friends.

We walked up to them and I asked him where Helga was.

"Beats me." He didn't even look up at me and continued playing his game.

"I thought she was with you…"

"She was… but as you can see, now she's not."

My patience was running out so I took a deep breath. "Then where is she?"

Finally stepping away from the game, he turned and shoved me away. "I said  _I don't know_! I'm not a fucking babysitter!"

I clenched my fist and tried to stay calm. "Where did you last see her?"

A smug smile curved his lips as he slowly replied, "Upstairs… second door on the right…"

"Why'd you take her upstairs?"

"Chill out, dude! What are you… her Dad?" Laughing, he stepped aside. "Go on upstairs. I probably left her nice and randy for you…"

What happened next was a blur. All I remembered was hot fury building up. One moment I was slamming my fist into Jeremy's face and the next I was lying on my back looking up at his bleeding nose while one of his friends was pulling him back.

"Let go of me! I'm fine!" He shoved his friend's hands away and pointed his finger at me. "Stay away from me, kid. I'm warning you."

Gerald reached down and helped lift me up. "Are you okay, man? Let's just find Helga and get out of here before you get  _both_  our asses kicked."

"Fine." I wiped blood off my split lip with the back of my hand. So that's what it felt like to get your ass kicked. It was already beginning to swell.

We found Helga exactly where Jeremy had left her. She was lying on the couch with her face buried in a cushion and her hand dangling to the floor gripping her cellphone. Phoebe sat down next to her and tried waking her up but she just vaguely opened her eyes and mumbled something in her sleep.

Gerald and I tried everything, from shaking her to pouring water into her face, but nothing worked. How much had she had to drink?

Phoebe sighed. "We'll just have to take her back to my house. I'm sure her parents won't mind if I tell them she's sleeping over."

I turned Helga over and slid my arms under her legs and back and lifted her off the couch. Her head slumped against my shoulder and her arm came around to hug my neck. Then I carried her to Gerald's car.

Sid and Stinky weren't coming back with us so I laid Helga down on the backseat and climbed in through the other side, lifting her head up and resting it on my lap. She muttered something about being cold, so I took my jacket off and wrapped it around her.

When we arrived at Phoebe's place, Gerald asked me if I could carry Helga up to Phoebe's room while they said good-bye to each other outside. I didn't like the idea of walking up alone with Helga. What if I ran into Phoebe’s parents? But they weren't going to see each other most of the summer and I figured they just wanted some time alone together.

As I climbed up the stairs, I creeped into Phoebe's room, careful not to wake her parents up. I gently pushed the bedroom door open with my foot and carefully placed Helga on one side of the bed. I slid her shoes off and pulled the blanket over her. I knew I shouldn't stay any longer than I already had, but as I glanced down at her sleeping, I impulsively bent down and brushed a kiss over her forehead.

"You don't need to wear cologne…"

"What?" When I pulled away, I found her drowsy eyes looking up at me.

"I said you don't need to wear cologne… You already smell nice… You  _always_  smell nice…"

I chuckled and sat down next to her on the bed. "Thanks, Helga."

"You're welcome…" She closed her eyes and breathed. "…football head." She was silent for a moment and then said, "I'm gonna miss you…"

"I'm gonna miss you too, Helga… you have no idea."

Helga stumbled back to sleep and as I stood up, something on Phoebe's nightstand caught my eye. It was Helga's pink ribbon hanging out of a notebook with the initials 'H.G.P.' inscribed on the front cover. I grabbed the notebook and opened it to the page where the ribbon was laid in and read:

" _Of Everything I have seen,_

_It's you I want to go on seeing;_

_Of everything I have touched,_

_It's your flesh I want to go on touching._

_I love your cornflower hair._

_I am moved by the sight of you smiling._

_What am I to do, love, loved one?_

_I do not know how others love_

_Or how people have loved in the past._

_I live, watching you, loving you._

_Being in love is my nature."_

I heard footsteps down the hall and quickly closed and hid the notebook under my shirt. I wasn’t sure why I did it. I knew it was wrong to take something that didn't belong to me, but I desperately needed to find out what it was. I walked out of the room and bumped into Phoebe.

"Oh! See you soon, Pheebs!"

"See you, Arnold. Hope you have a nice summer."

"You too!"

I kissed her cheek and walked down the stairs.

**Note:**  The poem I used is not mine. It's from a famous poet named Pablo Neruda. I just modified it a bit to make it fit Helga.

 


	5. Hopes and Memories

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 5 – Hopes and Memories  **

****

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

"What?! You're still in bed?! C'mon, man! It's time to go!"

"What…?" I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes out of their sleepiness. "What time is it…?"

"Time to get your ass out of bed!" Gerald said as he kicked the door closed behind him.

I turned to look at my alarm clock: _8:53 a.m. Oh, shit!_ I stumbled out of bed and grabbed a pair of jeans that were lying on the floor.

"Why didn't anyone wake me up?"

"Didn't you turn your alarm clock on?"

I pulled my pajama top off and put on a t-shirt. "I guess I forgot…"

I had stayed up late last night thinking about the notebook I'd found on Phoebe's nightstand. It was filled with poems –  _romantic_  poems – that seemed to be about one person in particular.

_Could it really be Helga's?_ It had her initials on it, and I knew from English class that she was a very good writer, but this didn't seem like the kind of stuff she'd write about. I mean, _Helga?_ A sarcastic, sneering bully… writing  _love_ poems? It didn't make any sense.

"Your grandpa's already loading the car, man. You better move it or we'll lose the flight!"

"I know, Gerald. Five minutes…"

Gerald's eyes followed me around back and forth as I paced through my bedroom gathering all my stuff together. When he grew tired of standing, he moved over to sit on the bed and felt something hard. He reached down and pulled the notebook from under the sheets.

"What is this?"

My eyes popped wide open and I ran to snatch it off his hands. "It's nothing… It's… private." I answered, still clutching the notebook.

Gerald narrowed his eyes. "Fine… If you don't wanna tell me, it's none of my business…" He shrugged his shoulders and headed for the door. "I'm gonna help your grandpa finish loading the car. I'll c'ya downstairs."

I was about to throw the notebook back on the bed after Gerald had closed the door, but for some reason I shoved it into my backpack instead. When I was finally ready to go, I yanked my backpack over my shoulder and pulled my suitcase down the stairs.

Ernie drove us to the airport. There were so many people leaving the city for summer break, the traffic was terrible. We barely made it in time to catch our flight.

Once we'd boarded the plane and were settled in our seats, Gerald called Phoebe to say one last good-bye before we took off. I listened closely to see if she mentioned anything about a missing notebook, but when she didn’t, I pulled my headphones over my ears, closed my eyes and hoped to wake up just before we landed.

Six long hours later, we were finally landing in Costa Rica.

As soon as we stepped out of the plane onto the jet way, we felt the heat and moisture in the air. The airport was a complete chaos. It took us forever to find a taxi, but we eventually made it to our hotel.

The hotel was small and rustic, and right next to the beach. It wasn't luxurious, but it was nice, comfortable and clean. Grandpa booked two rooms with a balcony overlooking the sea; one for him and Grandma and another for me and Gerald. A bellboy escorted us to our room and placed our bags on the floor near the closet. He showed us how to use the air conditioning, handed us a brochure with a list of services the hotel provided, the restaurant's schedule and a calendar of daily activities, and then left saying we should call the front desk if we needed anything.

Before we started unpacking, Gerald and I stepped out into the balcony to look at the view.

"Man, Arnold! This is gonna be great!"

"Yeah…" I exhaled.

The view was incredible. The sand was a white creamy color, the trees a shade of bright green, and the sea was a light turquoise that seemed to stretch out forever.

We enjoyed the breeze and fresh air and the sound of the waves hitting the beach for a while and then went down to the lobby to meet Grandma and Grandpa for lunch.

After lunch, we went back to our hotel room and started unpacking. When I pulled a sweatshirt out of my backpack, the notebook went flying to the floor. Gerald bent down to pick it up and, looking at it curiously, handed it out to me.

"Are you gonna tell me what the big secret is?"

I took the notebook from him and sat down on the bed. "I think it belongs to Helga…" No point in lying to Gerald.

Gerald's eyebrow dropped. "What do you mean you  _think_ its Helga's?"

"I found it in Phoebe's room."

"And you just… took it?" He didn't sound happy with the idea of me stealing stuff from his girlfriend's bedroom, and I didn't blame him. "How do you know it's not  _Phoebe's_?"

"It has Helga's initials on the cover."

"So what? That could mean anything!"

"I know… but it also had Helga's pink ribbon inside it… and I'm sure this isn't Phoebe's handwriting. I've borrowed her notes from class before."

"Okay," He breathed. "…so let’s say its Helga's…  _Why_  the hell did you take it?"

"I don't know…" I shook my head. "I opened it and found a love poem and– "

"Wait…  _what_?! A  _love_  poem?" He burst out laughing. "Then we know its  _definitely_  not Helga's."

"I'm telling you, Gerald… its Helga's."

"No way, man!  _Helga G. Pataki_ writing love poems? Get real!" He sat down on the bed still grinning. "And even if it was… so what? Are you trying to find out who the love poems are about? That might not be such a good idea, man. You might find out about something you won't like."

"Like what?"                                   

"…like what if they're about that Jeremy guy?"

I involuntarily clenched my jaw. "I don't think so… The dates written at the bottom don't match."

"So who else could it be? I don't remember her ever dating anyone."

After hours and hours of thinking and remembering, last night I'd come up with a crazy idea. I wasn't sure how or why it had stuck to my brain. I didn't even know if I wanted to say it out loud, but as it came back to me I couldn't help blurting out, "Do you remember the little pink notebook we found in 4th grade?"

"Yeah…" Gerald frowned.

"I think that one could've belonged to Helga, too."

Gerald looked at me as if I were losing my mind. I knew it was a crazy idea, but for some reason it didn't seem  _that_  crazy to me.

"That would mean she's had a crush on you since 4th grade, Arnold."

"I know."

"That's completely insane, man!"

I didn't know why, but I was suddenly starting to get irritated.

"You've liked Phoebe longer than that, Gerald."

"That's different! I didn't spend every fucking day bullying her around and humiliating her." He paused for a moment and then asked, "What makes you think the other one belonged to her too anyway?"

"I'm not sure. I just– "

"Dude, this is completely nuts! I know you like the girl, but you can't just start connecting random things together and building up ideas into your mind! And you can't go around stealing her stuff!"

"Do you think I don't know that?!" I snapped. "Do you think I don't realize how crazy this all sounds?! But I can't explain it, Gerald!" I breathed hard, "It's just something I feel in my  _guts_!"

I turned and stormed out of the room onto the balcony and sat down on one of the chairs.

After I'd cooled down a bit, Gerald came outside and sat down next to me.

"I'm sorry man. I didn't mean to upset you."

I didn't look up at him. "Its fine, Gerald."

"No, it's not fine. You're my best friend, Arnold." He placed his hand on my shoulder and squeezed it. "I might not understand why you like her, but I can see this is a big deal to you and I wanna be supportive."

" _I_  don't even understand it, Gerald. I don't expect  _you_  to." I said, finally looking up at him.

"I guess… but still, I'm sorry man. It's just that…" He took a deep breath and removed his hand from my shoulder. "… I don't want to see you get hurt. And with this whole Helga thing, you seem to be on dangerous ground."

"I know… but I can't help the way I feel, Gerald."

He nodded. "Are we cool?"

"We're cool." I half smiled and we made our handshake thing before going inside to finish unpacking.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I had to blink a few times as I opened my eyes to get rid of the gleaming blindness from the sun shining in through the window. When I was finally able to see, I realized I was waking up in Phoebe's room. She was sitting at her desk reading something on her computer.

As I sat up, a sharp pain pierced my head. It was like someone had put a bullet through my right temple and hammered a handful of nails into my skull.

"Geez, Pheebs!" I grumbled, blocking the sunlight from my face with my hand. "Close the drapes will ya? Crimeny!"

"Oh! I'm sorry Helga." She whispered and stood up to close the drapes. “I didn't realize the sun was on your face. How are you feeling?"

I dragged my legs from under the sheets and noticed for the first time that I was wearing Arnold's jacket. I pulled the fabric up to my nose and breathed in long and deep. It still smelled mostly of the cologne he was wearing last night, but his scent still lingered, so perfect it almost cured my headache.

"I figured you wouldn't be feeling very well, so…" Phoebe leaned over the nightstand and handed me a glass of a weird looking concoction. "…Drink this. It's supposed to cure any hangover."

"Eew!" I pushed her hand away. "That looks gross!"

"Trust me, Helga. It'll make you feel a lot better."

In no mood to argue with her, I snatched the glass from her and gulped it down. It actually didn't taste as bad as it looked.

When I placed the glass back down on the nightstand, I looked up and found Phoebe staring at me as if she was waiting for me to say something.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Aren't you going to tell me about last night?"

I felt my right brow sink lower as I tried to guess what the hell she was talking about.

"Oh! C'mon, Helga! You know… about what happened between you and Jeremy? …Upstairs?"

My spine went suddenly rigid. "How the  _heck_  do you know about  _that_?"

Phoebe bit her lip and looked away. "Jeremy told us– "

" _What?!"_  I stumbled out of bed and grabbed her shoulders. "What  _exactly_  did he say?! And who do you mean by  _'us'_?"

"Well, he wasn't very specific, but he sort of implied that something had happened between you two. I'm sorry you had to find out what a  _jerk_ Jeremy is, but– "

"I couldn't care less about that, Phoebe! Just tell me  _who the heck_  you meant by 'us'?!"

"I meant Gerald, Arnold and me."

"That son of a  _bitch_!" I clenched my fists and paced about the room. "Are you saying that  _jackass_  told Arnold that we fooled around? I can't believe it! Backstabbing  _asshole_!"

The leech had figured out I liked Arnold and so had deliberately told him! I was so angry! No… I was furious… Then I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks as a thought struck me. "Did he say anything  _else_  to Arnold?  _Anything_  at all?"

"Uhm… no." Phoebe blushed. "There wasn't much time for him to say anything after that."

"What do you mean?"

"Arnold punched him."

I wasn't sure I'd heard right. "Did you just say Arnold…  _punched_  him?"

"Yes!" She laughed. "You should've seen it, Helga! Right on the face!"

For a split second, I couldn't breathe. Arnold… my nonviolent, peaceful  _Arnold_  had punched someone's face for _my_  sake?

"I think you're not as indifferent to him as you thought you were, Helga."

I could hear Phoebe's words, but the hard beating of my heart muffled them.

No… I shouldn't let myself think that way. I shouldn't dream that high. Things were just the way they were and I'd made up my mind to move on.

But then _, why was a tiny spark of hope still smoldering in my chest?_

"No, Phoebe… I'm sure it didn't  _mean_  anything. Arnold was just trying to be a good friend… like he always is."

"If you say so Helga... So," She blushed again. "You and Jeremy didn't…?"

"Crimeny, Pheebs! How can you even ask that?!  _Of course_  we didn't!" I went over to sit next to her on the bed. "We did sort of fool around a bit, but nothing really happened."

"I'm glad."

"And what happened after Arnold punched him?"

"Well…" She grimaced. "Jeremy punched him back."

"H-he  _hit_  Arnold?" Blood ran cold through my veins. "Did he hurt him?"

"He knocked him down and split his lip. Arnold was lucky Jeremy's friends held him back or he would've done a lot more damage."

My jaw clenched. "Jeremy's lucky he's going away to college, or I swear I'd beat the crap out of him  _myself_!"

Phoebe's cell phone rang and it was Gerald calling to say good-bye. I heard him say they were on the plane and a sad longing filled my chest. How was I going to make it through the whole summer without seeing Arnold?

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

Six weeks were almost up and I'd enjoyed every minute of them in Costa Rica. We had such a great time exploring and traveling around the country. Even though it was rainy season, it had hardly rained and it always felt warm.

Grandma had the time of her life when we went kayaking and water rafting down the Pacuare and the Sarapiqui River. We booked a few tours from our hotel to many small towns nearby; we took the Gondola of the Aerial Tram over the tropical forest and rode an ATV through the jungle. We did some surfing and snorkeling, and we sunk into the amazing thermal spring waters of the Tabacon after visiting the Arenal volcano.

Everything had been incredible; the beautiful scenery, the people, the food, and all the exciting things we'd done. But nothing had made me forget about Helga. She was always on my mind, and the closer we got to going back home, the more I thought about her. Everywhere I went and everything I did, I imagined her enjoying it with me.

We had one last weekend left in Costa Rica and a group of young people we'd met at our hotel had invited me and Gerald to a bonfire party half a mile down the beach. So, after the sun had gone down, we headed down there with a six-pack of beer each.

We hadn't walked that far when we saw a huge bonfire blazing in the distance. As we got closer, music wafted towards us. Everyone was having a great time laughing, singing and dancing, and they were all very friendly and welcoming. They offered us some 'guaro', a strong typical Costa Rican drink made from sugar cane, and introduced themselves. We met people from all over the world: Jessica from Canada, Jesus from Mexico, Natalia from Colombia, Aiden from New Zealand, Brendon from South Africa, and Pablo from Italy.

The party went on till dawn. Gerald and Pablo were the only ones who hadn't held out to the see the sunrise; they had both passed out on the beach after having a little too much to drink.

I grabbed one of the last bottles of beer left by the dying fire and walked down to the edge of the beach to sink my feet in the water. The sun was rising up from the water giving shape to the clouds and covering the sky with shades of pink, yellow and orange. I felt my body warm up and thought of Helga.

As I looked down at my feet submerged in the water, I felt a light tap on my shoulder and turned around.

Jessica smiled, holding her bottle of beer up. "Cheers, Arnold."

"Cheers." I clinked mine to hers and took a sip.

"So… who is it you're missing?"

"Missing?"

"Yeah. I can tell from the look on your face. You're wishing there were someone here with you, am I right?"

"It's that obvious, huh?" I chuckled.

"Sort of." She half smiled and shrugged her shoulder. "Or maybe I just see it cause I feel the same way."

Jessica, along with the rest of the group, was part of a student scholarship programme from a Latin American foundation called 'Un Grano de Arena' and had been traveling around South and Central America for the past year.

"Yeah… I guess it must be hard not seeing your friends and family for so long."

"It is. But it's also been really exciting and I've learned so much from the experience. I guess you just have to take the good with the bad."

"I guess." I took another sip from the bottle and looked out into the sea. "So what exactly is this programme about?"

"Well," She drank from her beer and took a deep breath as if she were about to give a long speech. "…the deal is you travel around Latin America for a whole year teaching in underserved populations – mostly kids and young teenagers – and at the end you earn a full university scholarship. Not to any university, of course… but they  _do_  have an extensive list of worldwide options, and a lot of them are well-renowned universities."

"Sounds interesting."

"It has been. You meet all kinds of people and you get to see a lot of beautiful places you never even knew existed."

"Where have you been to in the last year?"

"I've been to El Salvador, Nicaragua, San Lorenzo and now Costa Rica. This is my last stop before I go back home and start college."

When I heard her mention San Lorenzo, I felt a familiar pain in my chest that I hadn't felt in a long time. Five years ago, I'd found out that my parents had in fact died in San Lorenzo many years ago, and even though I'd gotten used to the idea, it still hurt to think about it.

"San Lorenzo?"

"Yeah… why? Ever been there? It's such a beautiful place!"

"No." I sighed and looked away. "No, I've never been there. But I have heard a lot of stories about it."

"Well, if you ever get the chance you should definitely go there."

"And do you get to choose where you go?"

"Sometimes you do."

The sun was now completely up and the sky had turned a light blue. My eyes had grown tired and my body longed for a bed and a fluffy pillow.

"I think I should go back to the hotel." I yawned. "But thanks. I had a great time."

Jessica smiled and nodded. "Yeah, me too."

I walked up to Gerald and pulled him up. He stood up half opening his eyes and looking like a zombie. I hooked his arm around my neck and turned back to Jessica before dragging him back to the hotel.

"It was really nice to meet you, Jessica."

"It was nice to meet you too, Arnold." She smiled again. "And hey… if she's got a bit of brain in her, I bet she's missing you too!"

When we finally got to our hotel room, I slumped Gerald on his bed and fell asleep as soon as my head touched the pillow.

We woke up hours later feeling like a truck had run us over and had breakfast brought up to our room. When we finished eating, we walked down to the beach and found Grandma and Grandpa lying on the sand under an umbrella drinking out of a coconut.

After the hectic summer we'd had, we decided to spend our last day in Costa Rica just slacking on the beach.

"Well, hello boys!" Grandpa said with a smirk. "You up late last night?"

"More like early this morning." I yawned and sank down next to them.

Gerald collapsed onto the sand, closed his eyes, slipped his sunglasses on and drowsed off.

I sat there for a while, just looking at the people around us. I wasn’t sure how long I’d been watching a small kid nearby building a sandcastle until a huge wave came up and destroyed it. His sandcastle hadn’t been very big, but he still looked pretty disappointed, so I walked up to him and offered to help him build a new one.

His whole face lit up. “Really?”

“Yes, really.” I smiled. “What’s your name?”

"Kevin. What's yours?"

"I'm Arnold." I held out my hand and shook his. "Nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too." He said as he helped me draw an outline for our sandcastle on the wet sand.

I taught Kevin all my tricks and techniques to build a sandcastle, and we worked together to build the biggest, strongest, coolest sandcastle we’d ever seen. We decorated it with seashells we gathered from the shore and carved little bricks, rocks, windows and doors on it.  

When it was finished, we both stood back and contemplated our masterpiece.

"Wow! This is the best sandcastle I've ever built!" Kevin said as he hugged my waist. "Thank you so much, Arnold!"

"It is pretty awesome." I grinned and hugged him back. Looking at this sandcastle now reminded me of the one I’d once built with Helga a long time ago to win a sandcastle competition.

Kevin pulled back and ran to his Mom, who had been sitting nearby watching and smiling at us the whole time, and asked her to take a picture of our sandcastle. She smiled and took her camera out of her purse as Kevin and I stood proudly on each side of the castle and said _“Cheese”._

The sun was now setting and they had to leave, so his Mom shook my hand and smiled and thanked me for helping her son.

Before following his Mom up the beach, Kevin ran towards me and hugged me one last time. "Thanks, Arnold! I'll never forget our sandcastle."

He beamed up at me and a moment later was gone, but a smile still lingered on my face. I'd never forget our sandcastle either.


	6. Heating Up

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 6 – Heating Up  **

****

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I counted the days since Arnold had left, just waiting for him to come back. It felt like the longest summer break of my life… and not in a good way.

The only person I actually liked being around lately was my nephew Andrew, who had just turned three. Every time Olga and the rest of the knuckleheads were planning an evening out, I always volunteered to stay behind and baby-sit.

Spending time with Phoebe had been torture! All she ever talked about was how much she missed Gerald and she'd keep me updated about every freakin' thing he and Arnold did, which only made me miss Arnold even more. At home, Olga was driving me crazy! Everywhere I turned there she was, making up excuses to spend time with me. I swore I'd go insane if I heard the phrase  _'I love you, baby sister'_  one more time. Big Bob had taken some time off work, so he was always home annoying the crap out of me, and Miriam was always busy with the baby or watching T.V.

Andrew was like me in a lot of ways, never listening to a word his Mom said and always giving her a hard time. I adored the little brat!

One day, I took him to  _Dinoland_ , just the two of us, and we had a great time. I spent my whole month's allowance on candy, toys and souvenirs for him and went on rides I would otherwise never be caught dead on just to make him happy. I was turning out to be quite the spoiling aunt, and I loved it! Who would've thought?

It was finally the night before Arnold was coming back home and I was so excited I couldn't sleep. I lay in bed staring up at the ceiling and thinking about what Phoebe had told me. _Why had Arnold punched Jeremy?_ Even if Jeremy had told him that we had fooled around, why did Arnold even care? Or maybe he realized Jeremy was being a jerk and was trying to be a good friend? But Arnold never did that kind of thing! I didn’t think he’d _ever_ punched _anyone_ before.

I was dying to tell Arnold that nothing had really happened, but what would he care anyway? And I should stop thinking about all of this! I was supposed to be getting over him!

"Aargh…" I pulled my pillow over my face and mumbled, "What the  _heck_  are you doing to yourself, Helga? Just stop! Stop thinking about him!”

I'd made a promise to myself and I had finally figured out a way to be around Arnold without a constant need to insult or bully him. No good could come of me bringing my hopes up now…  _again_!

The phone on my nightstand beeped. I reached out to grab it thinking, ‘ _Great! Another text message from Phoebe saying_ –‘

I froze as I looked at the screen.

It was a text message from Arnold!

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

I rolled around in bed, tossing and turning, and looking up at the time every five minutes, but I just couldn't fall asleep. We were finally going back home tomorrow and all I could think about was how much I wanted to see Helga.

I grabbed my cellphone from the nightstand and browsed through my contact numbers until I found Helga's. I started writing her a text message, but before clicking the send button, I paused. _Should I send her a text message this late at night? Wouldn’t that be kind of weird?_

Feeling bravado, I clicked ‘send’ and waited.

My message read, _‘Hey, Helga! Are you awake?’_

Moments went by and there was no answer. Maybe she was already asleep… or maybe she just didn’t want to talk to me. I had almost given up hope, when a text came in.

_‘Hey, football head! What’s up?’_

My heart beat harder.  

_‘I can’t sleep.’_

_‘What’s on your mind?’_

_‘Just thinking about us coming back home tomorrow.’_

_‘I guess I wouldn’t want to leave Costa Rica either.’_

_‘It’s not that. I’m excited about going back home.’_

_‘Don’t see why. It’s been kinda boring around here.’_

Without giving it much thought, I next wrote, _‘Are you busy tomorrow? Wanna hang out?’_

After that, the messages going back and forth suddenly stopped. Had I been too forward? Was she thinking it over? Every second that I didn’t get a reply felt like an eternity.

Then, my phone beeped again.

_‘Sure. Why not?’_

_‘Cool! Pick you up at 6?’_

_‘Fine. Now go to sleep, football head, and stop keeping me awake!’_

I rolled over to my side with the biggest smile on my face, closed my eyes and seconds later was fast asleep.

Early the next morning we checked out of the hotel and headed to the airport. The flight back felt twice as long and I just couldn't wait to get home.

When we finally arrived home after dropping Gerald off at his place, I helped Grandpa unload the cab and carry the suitcases into the boarding house. It was nice to be home, but I was already running late to see Helga so I just ran up, changed into a fresh t-shirt and hurried down the stairs.

When I got to Helga’s house, I took a deep breath and knocked on the front door. A moment later, Helga opened it wearing a baggy old t-shirt and a pair of torn jeans. Her hair was all messy but she had never looked more beautiful to me.

“Hey, Helga!”

"A-Arnold?"

"Why do you look so surprised?” I smiled. “We made plans to hang out, didn’t we?"

"Uhm… yeah, b-but you're _over an_   _hour_  late,  _foot-ball head_."

"Sorry... I didn’t think it’d take that long." Her eyes stayed fixed on mine. "So… what do you wanna do?" I asked, stuffing my hands in my pockets. "You wanna catch a movie or something?"

She opened her mouth to say something when a small hand tugged at her jeans from behind the door. It was her nephew Andrew.

"Sorry, Arnoldo. No can do." She bent down to pick him up and placed him on her hip. "I didn’t think you were coming, so I stayed home to baby-sit.”

"Who was dumb enough to leave  _you_  in charge of a kid?" I sneered.

"Shut up,  _foot-ball head_!" She smiled and turned to Andrew. "You love your aunt Helga, don't you?"

The little kid beamed up at her and, reaching out with his tiny chubby hands, pulled her closer into a hug. When she hugged him back and kissed his forehead, I felt something twitch in my chest. This was a side of her I’d never seen.

"I can help you baby-sit if you want. We could all watch a DVD together."

She looked up at me, still smiling, and then back at Andrew. “What do you say, Drew? Wanna watch a movie?”

The kid nodded and she stepped aside to let me in.

She led me into the living room and placed Andrew down on the floor by the T.V., where an enormous stack of DVDs were piled. I sat down next to him on the carpet and started looking through the pile while Helga went to the kitchen to make some popcorn.

We hadn't looked through a lot of the movies when Andrew pulled out  _Despicable Me_  and handed it out to me.

“This is what you wanna watch?”

He smiled and said yes, so I put the DVD in the player and sat him on the couch next to me. The starting credits began and, seeing that Helga hadn’t come back, I went into the kitchen to find her.

All the kitchen cupboards were open, and she was bent down looking for something in one of the bottom shelves.

“Can I help you look for something?” I asked.

She jumped up and banged her head on one of the doors. “Ouch!”

I tried hard not to laugh. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“It’s okay.” She rubbed the bump on her head. “I can’t find any popcorn.”

I glanced around the kitchen and saw a pack on one of the top shelves. “It’s right there.”

She followed my finger to the spot I was pointing at. “Oh... Right.” She tried reaching up for it but wasn’t tall enough.

I walked over there and leaned close behind her to grab the popcorn. When I looked down to give it to her, our faces were barely a few inches apart. Our eyes met and I visibly saw her swallow hard. She grabbed what I was offering and quickly moved away.

Her reaction made me think of my theory about the notebooks, and I suddenly desperately wanted to test it.

Helga opened the pack of popcorn and put it in the microwave. While she waited, she sat down on a stool by the counter.

I walked over to the other side and sat down on a stool across from her. "How was your summer?" I asked.

She glanced up at me and shrugged her shoulder. "Pretty boring… If it hadn't been for Andrew it would've sucked  _big_  time." She half smiled and looked down again. “How was yours?”

“It was cool. Costa Rica can be a lot of fun.”

“Yeah… I can imagine.”

“But it’s nice to be back. I missed –“, I was about to say ‘you’, but ended with ‘home’ instead.

We were quiet for a while and then I started to ask, "D-did you…" I stopped and swallowed, not sure how or if I should ask what I was about to.

"Did I what?"

"Did you… err...? Did you… see Jeremy again… during the summer?"

Helga's eyes shot up and her cheeks turned red.

"I… I mean–"

"No." She cut in.

An awkward silence fell.

“Nothing really happened, you know?” She finally said. “I mean… We kissed, but…”

“It’s okay. It’s none of my business.”

“I know, but I don’t want people thinking… _you know_.”

“It’s fine. I never really thought… _you know_.” I chuckled nervously and she soon joined in, which eased the tension around us a bit, but I wasn’t going to back down. I needed to test my theory.

I was about to open my mouth again when she said, "Thanks, by the way.”

I frowned. "For what?"

"For sticking out for me. Phoebe told me what happened."

“Oh… That.” I half smiled. “Did she tell you I got my ass kicked?”

Helga laughed out loud. “Yeah… Sorry about that, football head.”

"You would've done the same for me, right?"

"That's what friends are for…"

"Right… Friends.”

Our eyes met and held. _Friends…_ I guess we were friends. But I wanted to be… so much more. I knew it was crazy to think that Helga could have feelings for me –even crazier to think she’d had them for a while, but for as long as I could remember, there always seemed to be _something_ there between us, like a weird, special vibe. And looking into her eyes right then, I knew she was aware of it too.

"Helga…?" I asked, setting aside my nerves. "… Have you ever been… in love?"

Her face turned into a bright pink before the color drained out completely.

"Wh-wh…. Why are you asking me that?"

“I don’t think you were really that into that Jeremy guy, and I’ve never really… I don’t know.” I gulped down a lump that had formed in my throat. “I’ve never really seen you pay much attention to _anyone_ … except for Phoebe… and me.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“You pay a lot of attention to me.”

Helga’s breathing started to accelerate. “I-I… I, err…” She stammered and stood up, and walked over to the microwave, giving her back to me. “I don’t pay that much attention to you, Arnold. I just… I bully you around, like I bully everyone.”

No, she didn’t. She didn’t bully everybody else the same way she bullied me.

The microwave beeped and it was as if the atmosphere in the kitchen had suddenly changed. She took the popcorn out of the microwave, poured it into a bowl and spun around.

“And what kind of lame ass question is that, anyway, _football head_? What do _you_ care if I’ve ever been in love?”

“I was just wondering…”

“Well… no, I haven’t! …Happy?”

She was lying. She had to be lying. I had a whole notebook full of poems to prove it.

"Sorry I asked. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable."

She looked up at me, still a bit shaken. "Then stop making dumb questions."

“Fine.” I stood up and grabbed the bowl of popcorn from her hands. I picked one up and popped it into my mouth. “Like I said, I’m sorry.”

She popped a popcorn into her mouth too and we both silently walked back into the living room to join Andrew.

We found him sitting on the floor, a few feet away from the T.V., his eyes glued to the screen. He barely even looked up at us as we handed him the bowl of popcorn and sat down on the couch to watch the movie.  

About half way in, Helga noticed Andrew had fallen asleep, so she paused the movie and carried him upstairs to Olga’s old bedroom. When she came back downstairs, she asked me if I wanted to keep watching the film and I said yes.

She kicked her shoes off and snuggled onto the couch, pulling her feet up next to me. I moved my arm to reach for the remote to press play, and accidently brushed the sole of her foot. She jerked her foot away and I realized I had tickled her.

Just for the fun of it, I brushed my knuckles against her other foot and grabbed her by the ankle before she could pull it away.

"No!" She warned, giving me a hard stare. "Don't.”

I gave her a sly smile and pretended to brush the tip of my finger against her sole. She tried pulling it away but I still held on to it.

"I'm warning you, football head! Don’t do that!”

I grinned and shrugged a shoulder. "What are you gonna do about it?" Without taking my eyes off hers, I gently slid a finger right down the sole of her foot.

She squirmed and tried pulling her foot away, but I continued tickling her until she was laughing hysterically. She tried everything to make me stop, from kicking me with her free foot, to yanking on my t-shirt and pulling my hair, but I wasn’t ready to back down. She was laughing to the point of tears and begging me to stop when I finally let go of her ankle.

She took a moment to catch her breath and then, out of nowhere, jumped up on top of me and pinned me to the couch. “Never mess with Helga G. Pataki, football head!” she said, and started tickling me all over.

I wriggled around trying to break free, but a weakening sensation had swept over me as I laughed. When I couldn’t take it anymore, I grabbed her and rolled her off the couch with me. We both fell on the carpet with a hard thump.

I was stronger, but Helga was definitely faster. When I opened my eyes, she was already on top, straddling me. She grabbed my wrists and pulled them up to either side of my head, pinning me again now to the floor.

I knew I had the strength to shove her off if I wanted to, but as I lay there looking up at her smirk, our heavy heartbeats and pants echoing around us, all I could do was smile back and wait for my breathing to calm down. But as I did, my body slowly started to become aware of the fact that we were on the floor and Helga was straddling me.

The smile on my face gradually disappeared and I swallowed hard as a familiar urge came over me. My heartbeat started racing, blood rushing through my veins, pumping and causing pressure to start building up in my groin, making me hard.  Heat started to spread through my body; beads of sweat broke out on my forehead.

I panicked, so I shoved Helga off of me and jumped up from the floor, covering my growing crotch with my hands. My face burned as Helga’s stunned eyes rolled over me.

_Had she noticed? Please, God, no! Make her not have noticed!_

"I… err… I  _really_ need to pee," was all I could think to say.

“Oh… uhm… Bathroom’s that way.” She gestured down the hall.

I nodded and awkwardly strode towards the hall, all the while clutching my groin and wishing I would just drop dead and spare myself the humiliation.  

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

_Did what I think just happened really happen?_

I paced around the living room, my heartbeat racing and my mind spinning like crazy. Arnold had been in the bathroom for a full ten minutes.  _What the hell was he doing in there?_

I sat down on the couch and took a deep breath. My mind kept going back to the moment just before he’d shoved me aside. I was pretty sure I’d felt– “No, Helga! Stop thinking about it!” _–or maybe he’s just a little more well-endowed than you’d first realized…_

“Crimeny!” I stood up and started pacing again. “ _Nothing_ happened, okay?” I said to myself. But the image of what I saw when he’d stood up flashed through my mind. “Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!” I slapped my cheek and tried putting myself together.

In that moment, the front doorknob turned and a set of footsteps echoed through the hallway. _Perfect! The pack of loons had just come back!_

"Oh, Daddy! But how can you say that? I thought the musical was  _absolutely fantastic_!" Olga entangled her hands together and brought them up to her cheek.

"Worst two hours spent of my life!" Big Bob groaned.

Arnold picked that exact moment to come out of the bathroom.

Big Bob looked daggers at him. "Now, what do I always say, Helga?" he growled. "No boys allowed in the house while we're out!" 

"Oh, take a chill pill, will ya? Crimeny, Bob!" I folded my arms against my chest. "Arnold's just a friend."

"Calm yourself, Daddy! I'm sure Helga is telling the truth." Olga chipped in.

"Oh, brother…" I rolled my eyes.

Arnold scratched the back of his neck nervously and skimmed the crowd. "I, uhm… I was actually just leaving… It's getting pretty late and I have to head home." 

He started to walk towards the front door and I walked him out.

"So… I guess I'll see you on Monday at school, football head."

"Actually, I was wondering if you had plans tomorrow night." His eyes didn’t really meet mine as he said it.

"Err… slack around? Watch T.V.?"

He chuckled and again scratched the back of his neck, still not looking up at me. "Do you wanna go out?"

_What?! Go out… with Arnold? Was Arnold asking_ me _out?_

When I didn’t immediately say anything, he finally glanced up.

“Uhm… Okay. Pick me up at 7?”

“Okay.” He smiled and gave me a light peck on the cheek before turning away.

I stood there, under my doorframe for a whole minute, too shocked to move. _What the hell had just happened?_  


	7. Love Tokens

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 7 – Love Tokens **

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

It was already 6:53 p.m. and I was still in my underwear standing in the middle of a pile of clothes scattered all over my bedroom floor. I didn’t know _what_ to wear! Arnold had asked me out, but I had no idea where we were going. I stumbled onto my bed and ran my hands down my face. “Get a grip, Helga ol' girl! Its not like this is a real date anyway!”

I lay there for a while, sprawled on the bed, until I heard the door bell ring and sat up. _Oh no! He’s here!_ I sprinted off the bed and desperately started looking through the pile of clothes.

Miriam knocked on the door.  "Helga…? Honey… your friend Arnold is here."

"I know, Miriam! I'll be down in a minute! Crimeny!"

I put on a pair of jeans and a blue spaghetti strapped tank top, tied my hair up in a big ponytail and pulled a pair of sneakers on, and rushed down the stairs.

Arnold was waiting for me just outside the front door. “Hey, Helga! You ready to go?”

I nodded and grabbed a set of keys from the coffee table.

“So… “ I asked, as we walked out, “where are we – “

I was cut short by the sight of Gerald and Phoebe waiting for us in Gerald’s car.

“I invited Gerald and Phoebe to come along. I hope you don’t mind?”

“Why would I mind?” I shrugged. _It’s not like I thought it was just going to be the two of us, stupid football head!_ Of course he had invited Phoebe and Gerald! Why would I think that he had just asked _me_ out?

I opened the door to Gerald’s car and climbed in. Arnold climbed in through the other side. I was suddenly not in the mood to talk, so I didn’t say much as we drove to wherever we were going.

After a while, I caught sight of a mass of twinkling lights up ahead and a huge Ferris wheel sticking out from the middle. I turned to Arnold.

“Is that where we’re going? To the fair by the pier?”

He smiled and nodded, and a knot formed in my throat.

_Did he…? Did he remember that day?_ I wondered. … _Nah! Why would he?_

The memory of _that day_ flashed through my mind. It had to be five or maybe six years ago. I had just spent a lousy summer listening to Bob and Miriam fighting and screaming at each other. It was the time when they’d come very close to divorce. I never knew how they worked things out in the end, but they did… eventually. That day, I’d been lying in bed reading a book for an assignment when I heard a door slam hard and a series of heavy footsteps coming up the stairs. The yelling started and I just couldn’t take it anymore. I grabbed a jacket and walked out into the hall. Bob was banging on the door demanding Miriam to open it. He didn’t even notice me walk down the stairs and leave out the front door.

I didn’t know where I was going, I just needed to get the hell away from there. I wondered through a park nearby for a while when I glanced up and saw an ad with a picture of the fair down at the pier. It reminded me of a birthday I’d spent there with both my parents and Olga when I was seven. It was the best birthday I’d had that I could remember, and it was one of the few times the four of us had actually had fun together.

Without giving it much thought, I climbed onto the next bus that would take me there and got off at the main entrance of the fair. I hadn’t brought enough money to buy a ticket, so I just stayed outside, sitting on a bench and staring up at the twinkling lights. I just wanted to be seven again and forget about everything else.

As my mind drifted away, I heard a familiar voice calling out to me in the distance, but I was too absorbed by the lights to turn around.

“Helga…?”

A hand waved in front of me and I had to blink a few times to come back to reality.

“Hey, Helga!”

I looked up and saw Arnold smiling down at me.

“A-Arnold?”

His smile broadened. “What are you doing here? Are you all alone?” I was too numb to say anything, so he kept talking. “I came down with my grandparents, Ernie and Mr. Hyunh.” He pointed at them waiting in line at the box office. “I just saw you and wanted to say hi.”

“Oh…” I looked away as I felt a tear roll down my cheek and quickly swept it away with the back of my hand. "… Hi."

Arnold sat down beside me. I saw him almost reach out for my hand resting on my lap, but hesitated and drew away. “Are you okay, Helga?”

“I’m fine.”

“I can see something’s wrong. Talk to me. There might be something I can do to make you feel better.”

“There’s nothing you can do.” I turned away. “Just go back to your family, football head, and leave me alone.”

“Try me.” This time his hand did reach mine, and I felt like I was about to burst.

I drew in a shaky breath and let it all out. “I just can’t take it anymore, Arnold! I’m so _sick_ and _tired_ of listening to Bob and Miriam shouting and complaining about each other all the time! And it keeps getting worse! I don’t even care if they do get a stupid divorce... I actually wish they did, so all this could be over!” I took a deep breath and wiped away the few tears that had rolled down my face. “I’ve tried ignoring them, but it’s no use. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“…I didn’t know things were _that_ bad Helga.” I felt a light squeeze on my hand. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.” I sniffed.

"Why did you come here?"

I finally glanced up at him and told him about that birthday I’d spend here years ago with my family, and how much it meant to me because I didn’t have a lot of happy memories of us being together.

After I’d finished telling him all about it, he stood up and held his hand out to me. “Well, what are we waiting for, then?”

I stared at his hand in front of me. “What?”

“Let’s go in!”

“I’m not going in, football head. I didn’t bring any money.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll buy.” When I didn’t move, he reached down to grab my wrist and pulled me up. “Come on!”

His face lit up with a contagious smile. If there was anything he could do to make me feel better, it was exactly that… and he did it!

It had turned out to be the perfect day. I looked back on it constantly. We had walked through the fair laughing and stuffing ourselves with cotton candy, we had played games and seen all the sideshows, and we had ridden all the roller coasters we could before it began to rain. Then, he had walked me back home holding an umbrella over our heads so we wouldn’t get wet. By the time I got home, I’d forgotten all about Miriam and Bob, and I was the happiest girl in the world…  

Gerald pulled the handbrake after parking the car, and I was brought back to the present from my memories.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

I knew Helga still remembered the day we'd spent together at this same fair years ago; I could see it in her eyes. I honestly hadn’t given that day much thought until recently, but now I couldn’t get it out of my head and I had really wanted to bring her here. It had turned out to be a very special day. _How could I not have seen it then?_ After so many years, I was finally starting to understand my feelings for Helga. _For how long had I really been in love with her?_  

We walked over to the box office and when I saw Helga reaching into her pocket for money, I stopped her. “It’s okay. I’ll pay.”

She arched an eyebrow. “I can pay for my own ticket, football head.”

“I know, but –“

“I mean, it’s not like this is some kind of date or anything…”

“A d-date?” I laughed nervously. “No, this is not a date. But I invited you, so I _want_ to pay.”

I went ahead and bought two tickets. The truth was I _did_ want this to be sort of like a date, but I didn’t know how to tell her, and I was afraid she’d say no if I asked her out on a real date. At the last moment, I had panicked and invited Gerald and Phoebe to come along hoping it wouldn’t feel as awkward.

“So,” Gerald asked, as we walked through the main entrance. “What do you wanna do first?”

Helga glanced at the bumper cars that were right in front of us. “I’m in for a go at the bumper cars, if you don’t mind getting your asses kicked.”

“I’ll take that challenge.” I said.

We each climbed into a bumper car and waited for the signal to go on. “Ready to bite the dust, _football head_?”

I smirked and tightened my grip on the steering wheel. “Oh, I’m ready.”

The alarm went off and we both hit the accelerator, smashing hard into each other. We burst out laughing and then kept chasing each other back and forth until the timer went off and we were escorted off the track. Helga was grinning from ear to ear, her face pink from the excitement and the exercise. “That was fun! Let’s try another ride!”

Next, we rode the carousel, the caterpillar, the cliffhanger, the drop tower and the tea cups. By the time we were done with all those rides, we were starting to get hungry, so we bought a ten inch hot-dog each and some nachos.

After we ate, Phoebe wanted to go see the fortune teller, so we all had our fortunes told. Apparently, Phoebe and Gerald were going to get married at 24, have five children and live in a big house outside the city before Phoebe was left a widow at age 76. I was going to fall in love with a beautiful European girl and marry her when I turned 32. I would move to a nice small town in Italy and live till the age of 98. Helga, on the other hand, was going to die a failed business woman and a spinster at the age of 45. I had to fight back a grin when I saw Helga’s face as the gypsy told her the bad news. She looked like she was about to punch the woman in the face! Of course, none of that came true. Gerald and Phoebe didn't get married; Helga didn't end up a business woman or a spinster; and I never fell in love with anyone after Helga.

I knew it was a cliché, but I wanted to win something for Helga. Maybe not a big cuddly bear, but something slightly less feminine, like a sponge sword or a funny hat. I tried the darts first, then the hoopla, skittles, basketball shooting, water pistols and archery, but I couldn’t win at anything! I even sucked at Hit-the-Bell! I was starting to think every game was just a fraud when I saw Gerald show up with a huge teddy bear he’d won for Phoebe. _Dammit!_

I dug into my pockets for more coins and realized I’d run out. Then I felt a light tap on my shoulder and turned around. It was Helga holding out a mini football keychain. She placed it in my hand with a half-smile. “You seemed so _desperate_ to win something.”

I looked down at it. “Did you win this?”

“Yeah… and it wasn’t even that hard. I could’ve picked something bigger, but I saw this and it reminded me of you.” She bit her lower lip in an attempt not to laugh. “You _really suck_ at these games, football head.”

I chuckled and wrapped my hand tightly around the keychain before putting it in my pocket. “Thanks, Helga. I love it!”

"So, can we  _finally_ move on to something else?”

“Yeah, man!” Gerald agreed. “We’ve been watching you play games way too long!”

“Oh, I know! Let’s go to the love tunnel!” Phoebe said.

Helga and I looked at each other uncomfortably, then I said “Sure… If you guys wanna go.”

“We do!” Phebe beamed at Gerald. “Right, Gerald?”

“Of course!” Gerald beamed back.

And so we headed to the love tunnel. The line was pretty long, so while we waited Helga and Phoebe went to look for the restrooms.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

I looked up at Phoebe through the mirror as we both washed our hands in the restroom. “Way to go on the whole love tunnel idea, Phoebe! Like I needed an excuse to make things more awkward between Arnold and me…”

"What do you mean, Helga? I thought things between you two were okay now."

I closed the water tap and pulled a paper towel to dry my hands. “Something happened that I haven’t told you about.”

That caught her attention. "Oh? What is it?"

My cheeks began to burn. "Yesterday, when Arnold came over, things got kind of… _you know_.”

“No, I don’t know.”

"We were sort of playing around…" I paused, embarrassed for what I was about to say. "… and I think he got a little  _too excited_ … if ya know what I mean."

Phoebe looked at me confused. “Too excited?”

"Crimeny, Pheebs! How are you not getting this?!” I lowered my voice as a woman with two kids walked into the restroom. “You know… _down there_."

"Oh…" Her eyes popped wide open as she realized what I was saying, and then she started to giggle. "And what did you do?" She whispered.

"Nothing! What was I supposed to do? He stood up and said he needed to pee and ran to the bathroom.”

Phoebe was still giggling, but tried to look serious when she said, “Poor Arnold! He must’ve been so embarrassed!”

“Yeah… no kiddin’.”

“Oh my Gosh, Helga! This could be proof of what I’ve been saying! Maybe Arnold really _does_ like you!”

"Oh, come on, Pheebs! This just proves Arnold's like any other teenager. They’re all crazy with their hormones flying all over the place!” I threw the paper towel in the trashcan and headed towards the exit. "All they ever think about is sex."

I noticed Phoebe wasn't following me, so I turned around. She was still standing in front of the mirror and her face had turned a bright red. "Speaking of which, Helga… there's something I want to talk to you about, too."

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

“Hey… man?” Gerald said as we waited for Phoebe and Helga to come back.

“Yeah?”

“There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about…”

“Ok… What?”

Gerald rubbed the back of his neck and took a deep breath. "Phoebe and I finally had  _the talk._ "

I knew exactly what he meant. He had wanted to talk to Phoebe about it for weeks. “From the look on your face, I’m assuming things didn’t go as well as you hoped?”

“Actually, we made plans for next weekend.”

“Wow, Gerald! That’s huge! Then why do you look so… disappointed? Shouldn’t you be excited?”

“I _am_ excited, but…” He looked away.

“What’s the problem? Isn’t this what you wanted?”

“Yeah, it is. But I’m feeling really nervous about it.”

“It’s not like this would be your first time, Gerald.”

“I know, but this time it’s different. I really care about her, Arnold. I don’t want to mess things up.”

“Don’t worry. You won’t.”

He was about to say something else, but I cut him short when I saw Helga and Phoebe heading our way. It was almost our turn to go on the ride.

Phoebe and Gerald went in first, and Helga and I climbed into the next boat. The tunnel was almost completely dark; we could barely see anything. It was also very quiet, the only sounds we heard were a repetitive ticking of the mechanism and the occasional thump of the gondola against the sides. There was also a weird smell, like that of stagnant water. The occasional cracks in the ceiling let in a small ray of light that let you see broken pieces of wood scattered along the sides and graffiti on the walls. _What could be romantic about this?_

“Wow… This is _so_ romantic.” Helga said, mirroring my thoughts.

“I know.” I said back, and burst out laughing.

She soon joined in. “And what _is_ that smell? It’s disgusting!”

“I don’t think we want to know.”

We continued to laugh as we were hauled up a small ramp and then pulled around a bend that took us back to the boarding point. Phoebe and Gerald were already waiting for us at the end.

After that fiasco, we decided to try the Haunted House. It was a big castle-like building with a foggy exterior, dim lighting and spooky noises coming out of every corner. You could hear people screaming inside.

“I’m not so sure I want to try this, guys.” Phoebe mumbled as an actor dressed up as a vampire came outside and guided us into the castle.

“Don’t worry, babe.” Gerald said, holding her hand. “I’ve got your back.”

The floorboards creaked beneath us as we walked into the welcoming parlor. The setting was decorated with peeled wallpaper, cobwebs, and a flickering chandelier. The vampire gave us instructions on how to travel through the castle and asked us all to hold hands with the person next to us. He led us down a black passageway and then disappeared into the darkness.

We kept on walking. Gerald was up front, leading us, and I stayed at the back. We could hear screams and crying, doors slamming and window shutters rattling. I felt Helga pull me closer and press back against me.

“I thought nothing scared Helga G. Pataki.”

“Shut up, _football head_!”

We continued down the hall until we got to a different room. It had the look and feeling of a sickroom. There was an old dirty bed in the middle and torn curtains and spider webs hung from the walls. Phoebe gasped when she noticed a man in the corner dressed in a long white nightshirt. His face was covered in deep bloody wounds and his body started to contort as he slowly took one step closer to us and then another. We all screamed and ran out of the room. After that, we ran into an evil clown, a serial killer with an electric saw, a werewolf, ghosts, zombies and witches, and more vampires, until we reached the last chamber. It was a bright white tiled room with blood splattered all over the walls, and fake corpses hanging from the ceiling. By now, Helga had completely let go of Phoebe and both her hands were clutched in mine. From between the hanging corpses, a crazy butcher with a knife came running towards us and chased us out through the exit.

We all ran outside screaming, Helga and I still tightly holding hands. We finally let go and bent over to catch our breaths. We looked at our flushed faces gasping for breath and burst out laughing.

“That was… really fun!” Helga panted.

_Yeah, it was._ Who would’ve thought that a haunted house could be so much more exciting and, in a way, _romantic_ , than a decaying love tunnel.

“I think I need something…” Phoebe breathed. “…a bit more relaxing after this.”

“We could go on the Ferris wheel.” I suggested, and everyone agreed.

It was getting late and the fair was starting to look empty, so there weren’t that many people waiting in line. We passed straight through. The attendant helped Helga onto the open-air capsule and I jumped in beside her as it moved forward. We watched the people passing by get smaller and smaller and saw the twinkling lights of the fair stretch below us. Up ahead, we could see the city lights.

A cool breeze swept over us as we reached the top. Helga shivered and wrapped her arms around herself. I started taking my jacket off.

“No,” she said. “You’ll get cold.”

“Don’t worry. I’m wearing a sweater underneath.” I wrapped my jacket around her shoulders and she snuggled into it.

“I still have your other jacket, by the way. I’ll give it back to you.”

“It’s okay. You can keep it. Just make sure you give _this one_ back to me, or I’ll run out of jackets.”

She chuckled and fixed her gaze on the reflection of the moon in the sea. I wondered what was on her mind.

I was quiet for a while and then said, "We finally got to ride the Ferris wheel."

She looked up at me. "Huh?"

"Last time we were here and wanted to go on it, it started to rain."

Her eyes twinkled and she half smiled. “I remember. You bought a colored umbrella at one of the souvenir stalls so we wouldn't get wet."

“Yeah…” I sighed.

Looking down at her, her body so close to mine and us being so far off the ground, I felt like we were the only two people on the planet. I imagined what it would be like to kiss her then. How would she react? Would she kiss me back? I leaned slightly closer and thought about lifting her face and kissing her…

She abruptly looked up at me and said, “Arnold… you’ve been a really good friend to me. You’re a good friend to _everyone_ , actually, but… I’ve never been anything but a bully to you. You’ve always been there when I’ve needed someone, and you’ve always found a way of making me feel better.”

I was speechless. I didn’t know _what_ to say.

She went on, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry and… thank you. I know I’m not an easy person to be around. Phoebe’s the only one who can actually stand me.”

I searched my mind for the right words. “Helga, I’ll admit you’re a little rough around the edges, but… I like you. I like you just the way you are. And if people can’t see how great you are, then to hell with them.”

“Yeah…” She grimaced. “That’s probably why I’m going to die sad and alone in my forties…”

“You know that’s a load of crap…”

“I know, but it _does_ sound likely, don’t you think?”

“No,” I frowned. “Anyone would be lucky to be around you.”

She smiled sardonically. “Oh, come on, _football head_! I saw the look on your face when I mentioned the possibility of this being a date…”

My chest squeezed at the realization that I’d hurt her feelings. “Helga, I –“

“Don’t get me wrong.” She cut in. “It’s not like I thought it was, or wanted it to be, okay? …And the truth is, I don’t blame you for feeling that way.”

“Helga, I didn’t mean it like that. Any guy would be lucky to go out on a date with you… _I_ would be lucky to go on a date with you.”

My heart began to pound as our gazes held. _This is it! …This is_ the _moment! Kiss her, you fool!_ My stomach tightened into a knot. _What is wrong with you? Just go for it!_ My heart went up to my throat and I swallowed hard. _The moment will pass! Come on, hurry up!_

Helga suddenly looked away as the attendant opened the door of the capsule and held his hand out to her. The moment had passed. _What an idiot!_

She grabbed his hand and jumped off. I jumped off after her.

We met Gerald and Phoebe at the bottom of the Ferris wheel, and Phoebe said, “You guys ready to go? It’s getting pretty late.”

We nodded and walked back to the car together. The ride back home was silent. I glanced at Helga a couple of times but her gaze didn't move away from the window. She was still wearing my jacket and she had pulled the sleeves down over her hands.

When we got to Helga's house, I got out of the car and walked her up to the front door. She opened it and turned around, taking my jacket off.

“Thanks, Arnold.” She held it out to me.

“You’re welcome.” I grabbed it and put it on, and when I tucked my hands in the pockets, I felt something inside that I’d completely forgotten about.

“Wait!” I said, before she stepped into the house. “There’s something I want to give you.” I pulled a turquoise heart-shaped seashell necklace out of my pocket. “I got it for you in Costa Rica.”

Her eyes grew wide and I stepped behind her to secure it around her neck.

She took it in her hand and looked down at it.                             

“Do you like it?” I asked.

“I… I love it.” Her lips didn’t move, but she smiled with her eyes.

“Helga..?!” A male voice called out from inside the house, interrupting the moment. “Is that you? Shut the door, will ya? What’s taking so long?”

Helga’s eyes rolled. “I’m just saying good-bye, Bob! Crimeny!”

I chuckled and waved good-bye. “I’m glad you liked it. I’ll see you at school.”

“Good-bye, football head.” She smiled and closed the door.


	8. More Like a First

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 8 – More like a first **

****

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

Our senior year of high school started out with a fresh optimistic atmosphere. Everyone was excited exploring their options and making plans for college. After a few weeks, however, when the excitement had worn off, things turned slightly less motivating. As it turns out, picking out colleges, studying for SATs and not falling behind on schoolwork wasn’t all it was cracked out to be.

I was seriously thinking of going into medicine, but also liked the idea of majoring in psychology. Helga hadn’t made up her mind yet either, but I was almost sure she was going to study literature. Gerald wanted to be a filmmaker, and Phoebe was deciding on Biochemistry or Environmental Sciences.

Things with Helga were going pretty good. We didn’t see each other as often because we only shared one class and we both had a tight schedule, but when we did, things just felt right. We’d developed some kind of flirtatious friendship. It’s not like we openly flirted with each other, it was more like this secret hidden chemistry we both knew we shared but never mentioned out loud. She still teased me and made jokes, but she didn’t bully me around anymore. Every day, I was more convinced that Helga had feelings for me.

And one day, I was finally able to confirm it.

I had just come out of the shower and was getting dressed. Grandpa had brought me up some dinner and placed the tray on my desk.

A few moments later, I heard him chuckle and say, “I never took you as a narcissist, Shortman!”

“What do you mean, Gran –“ I glanced over at him and saw that he was holding _the_ notebook. I ran over and snatched it away from him. “Why are you reading this? It’s private!”

Grandpa was taken aback. “If it’s private, then why was it lying around open on your desk?”

I immediately regretted my reaction. “I’m sorry, Grandpa. I shouldn’t have lashed out at you like that. I just don’t want people reading this.”

“I’ll say! Who writes poems like that about themselves?”

“I didn’t write them.”

“Oh…” He said. Then comprehension hit. “Oooohh…! You have an admirer then.” He leered.

“No, Grandpa. They’re just poems.” I closed the notebook and placed it on the desk again. “Wait… why did you think the poems were about me?”

“Well, isn’t it obvious?”

“Why?”

“Your name is written all over them.”

“My name?” I picked up the notebook and searched for the page Grandpa had been reading. “Where?”

“Right there. See?” He pointed at some letters in the poem. “If you put all the first letters of every line together, they spell out your name.”

He was right, they did. “Maybe it’s just a coincidence.”

“This isn’t the only one. The same thing happens with this one.” He turned the page and pointed at another poem. It was true. All the first letters of every line spelled out ARNOLD. “Double coincidence? I don’t think so. If you look through them, I’m sure you’ll find more examples.”

“I’ve read this at least a dozen times. How did I not see this?”

“Sometimes it’s easier to see things when you’re not really looking.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“Well, Shortman. I’m going to bed. Don’t stay up too late. Good night.”

“Good night.” I muttered, too stunned to look up.

I sat down on the desk chair and skimmed through the notebook again. Grandpa was right. Not every poem had the same structure, but I did find a lot more examples. I read it all more carefully and it all began to look clear to me. All these poems… they _were_ about _me_.

The realization of it all hit me like a sack of bricks. _Oh… My… God!_ Helga _was_ in love with me. She had been for… who knew how long!

I didn’t sleep that night.

The next day at school, I wasn’t sure how to talk to her. How could I go about pretending I didn’t know this? And now that I knew the truth, I began to see everything more clearly. The signs were all there, in the way she looked at me and talked to me. But how did I move forward now? Should I tell her I knew or should I just jump in and see what happened? I knew I had to be careful. She must have strong reasons for not ever telling me how she felt. I didn’t want to scare her away.

And what was I going to do with the notebook now? I was starting to panic. What if Phoebe or Helga started looking for it and noticed it was missing. What if she found out that I had it? How would I explain it? I needed to find a way of getting that notebook back into Phoebe’s bedroom. And I had just the guy. I just needed to convince Gerald of helping me out. But I had a feeling he wouldn’t want to get involved and I didn’t blame him. He could get into so much trouble if Phoebe found out.

Halloween was coming up and, as usual, Rhonda was planning a big costume party at her house tomorrow night. I was too busy working on an essay that weekend and wasn't planning on going, but Sid wouldn't take no for an answer and kept trying to convince me to go.

"Oh come on, Arnold!" Sid insisted as he held the classroom door open for me after Spanish class. "It's our last High School Halloween party!"

"I know, Sid, but I can't go." I walked up to my locker and Sid followed me close behind. "What difference does it make if I go or not, anyway?"

"I invited Hannah… "

"Yeah…. So? What does that have to do with me?"

Sid hesitated as I worked on the combination for my locker. "She has this friend… that kind of has a crush on you… And I told Hannah we'd all go together as a double date."

"You told her _what_?"

"Please, Arnold! … Who knows? You might end up liking her, too!"

"No, Sid. I'm  _really_ not interested. Do you even know who she is?"

"Hannah didn't tell me, but she said you two knew each other very well." I ignored him and started shoving my notebooks into my locker. "I'd owe you _big_  time!"

"No, Sid…"

"Please, please, please, Arnold!"

Before I could say anything else, a hand slammed my locker shut from behind. I turned around and saw Helga leaning onto the lockers with her arms crossed over her chest. "What's this bozo yapping about now, football head?"

"He’s just trying to convince me to go to Rhonda’s Halloween party tomorrow night, but I already told him I can't go."

She unfolded her arms and stood up straight. "You're not going? Why? I mean, it  _is_ our last Halloween together before we all go off to college."

“That’s exactly what I’ve been saying!” Sid cried.

"I can't. Our essay is due Monday and I've written  _one page_  so far! There's no way I'll finish it on time."

"Oh, brother! You're still working on that?"

"Yes, Helga… Not everyone is as  _literate_  as you." Helga always handed in the best essays in the classroom and got straight A's in all of them. "And I haven't had much time to write it."

"I'll tell you what… If you want to go to the Halloween party, I'll help you out with your essay on Sunday. Piece of cake." She held her hand out to shake mine. "Deal?"

I knew I was probably risking my grade by going to the party, but how could I say no to Helga, especially when she'd offered to help me out?

"Deal." I shook her hand.

"Great!" Sid shouted and rushed out the door. "See you at Rhonda's at 9:00! Don't be late!"

"No! Wait, Sid!" I called out, "That doesn't mean…", but he was already gone.

The next day, I went through some old boxes of costumes – mainly Grandma's – that Grandpa had packed up in the basement and found a white Phantom mask and a red cape to wear to the Halloween party. I combed my hair back, wore a black suit underneath the cape and put on a pair of fancy shoes I'd hardly ever worn.

At exactly 9 o’clock, Sid was already waiting for me outside Rhonda's house with two other girls. One of them was Hannah wearing a pink fairy costume. The other girl was dressed as Jessie the Cowgirl. As I got closer, I recognized who the other girl was.

“Lila…?”

She smiled sweetly at me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "Hello, Arnold. It's ever so nice to see you."

I tried smiling back at her. “Err… Yeah, it’s nice to see you too.” So, did this mean Lila was the girl who had a crush on me?

She linked her arm through mine, and the four of us walked into the party together. What was I going to do now? How was I going to get rid of her? I didn’t want to be rude, and I did still like her a lot, but my feelings had changed. I didn’t _like her like her_ anymore. I’d come to the party for Helga.

Rhonda had really outdone herself this year. Her whole house seemed to be pulled out of a scary movie. All the walls were decorated with heavy dark curtains, spider webs and scary old paintings, and the tables were covered with candlesticks and skulls, and all kinds of spooky stuff. It all looked pretty cool.

I heard Lila's voice in the background trying to tell me something, but my mind was only focused on finding someone else.

I felt a light tug on my arm. “Arnold? Is something wrong? You look worried.”

My eyes focused on Lila. "No, I'm fine, sorry. What were you saying?"

"I was just wondering if you could bring me some punch. I'm very thirsty."

"Oh… Uhm… Sure, Lila. I'll be right back."                              

"Thank you, Arnold. That's ever so nice of you." She smiled and batted her eyelashes.

I walked over to the snack bar and bumped into Phoebe. For a moment, I didn’t recognize her from all the green makeup on her face. She was dresses as the witch from _Wicked_. “Hey Pheebs! You’re looking scary tonight.”

I grinned and brought a smile to her face. “That’s exactly what I was going for.” She took a step backwards and examined my outfit. "And you… you're looking very handsome."

I blushed and said thanks, and poured a glass of punch for Lila. “Have you seen Helga around?”

“She hasn’t arrived yet, but I’m sure she’ll be here soon.”

"Okay, well… I'll see you around?”

"Sure, Arnold." She smiled and disappeared into the crowd.

The party soon started to crowd up; you could barely walk from one point to the next. I saw a lot of familiar faces, but not the one I was looking for. Why was it taking her so long to get here?

“Arnold…” Lila was saying. “I just wanted to tell you that I didn’t plan this.”

“Huh?” Was all I could say.

“I didn’t ask Hannah or Sid to invite you here tonight… I guess we were set up.”

“Don’t worry about it. We’re here now, right? We might as well just have fun.”

I could tell that wasn’t the answer she was hoping for. “Yeah… I guess you’re right.”

I smiled and looked around, this time looking for Hannah or Sid. It felt like hours since they’d sneaked away and left me alone with Lila. And there was still no sign of Helga. I started to feel anxious and lost track of how many drinks I’d had. I knew I was drunk the moment I turned around too quickly and everything went spinning.

Lila either didn't notice or chose to ignore this fact. She went on rambling about school and college and all the things she wanted to do, and I just stood there trying to keep my balance and listen.

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

I arrived late at the party because Miriam had messed up my Virginia Woolf costume and I had to go around all over town looking for a last minute Halloween costume. The only decent thing I could find was a stupid Wonder Woman outfit.

By the time I finally got there, the whole place was jammed and I could barely crush in through the crowd. I couldn’t find Phoebe, or Gerald, or Arnold. I was squeezing through the crowd looking for them, when I knocked into someone and he almost fell over. My reaction was to reach out and grab his arm to steady him. He turned around.

“Football head?”

“Helga!” He grinned and leaned over me to hug me and almost fell down again.

I again steadied him. “Are you drunk?”

“Yeah… I think so.”

“Where are Phoebe and Gerald?”

“I don’t know.” He didn’t look so good.

“Why are you just standing here all alone?”

“I… uhm…” He took a deep breath. “I was waiting for Lila. She’s in the bathroom.”

_Lila, huh?_ I tried hard not to roll my eyes. “Well, I think you should sit down.”

He nodded and I put his arm around my shoulder to help him find somewhere to sit down. We found an empty bench in the garden and I sat down next to him. “Should I bring you something?”

“No, just… Just stay here.” He leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. “I just need a minute to sober up.”

I bit my tongue not to laugh. I’d never seen him like this! “Geez! How much did you have to drink, football head?”

“I honestly don’t know.”

A while later, Phoebe and Gerald found us, and we all stayed outside with Arnold waiting for him to feel a bit better. When he finally felt like he could stand and walk properly, we went back into the party.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

I hadn’t completely sobered up, but I was feeling a lot better when we walked back into the party, and I was starting to have a lot of fun. We were laughing and joking around, when I felt someone tap my shoulder.

It was Lila. I felt my face burn up. I had completely lost track of time and forgotten about her.

“Where have you been? I’ve been looking for you everywhere!”

“I’m _so_ sorry, Lila, I wasn’t feeling very well, so –“

She cut me off. “Can we please go outside and talk? There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”

My stomach flipped and I gulped. I knew what she was going to say and I realized I didn’t want to hear it. Not anymore. I just nodded and let her lead me outside. When we reached the garden, she sat me down next to her on the bench – the same bench I’d been sitting on a while ago – and started fidgeting with her hair. It occurred to me that we were both equally nervous but for two very different reasons.

She looked up into my eyes, took a deep breath and opened her mouth. "Look, Arnold… I don't know how to say this, but…" Her gaze dropped to the ground. "… I've recently felt  _different_ about you."

"Different?" My heart drummed inside my chest.

"I'm not sure how or when it happened, but… I really like you, Arnold." Her eyes met mine again. "And I wanted to know if you still feel the same way."

“Lila, I…” I didn’t know what to say.

She leaned in closer to me. “Yes, Arnold?”

“I-I…”

Her lips touched mine. For a moment, I couldn’t move. _What was she doing?_ It took me a moment too long, but I pulled away.

The disappointment was clear on her face.

“I’m sorry, Lila… I can’t.” Tears swelled in her eyes and I felt really bad. “I wish I could say I feel the same way, but..”

“I know, Arnold. Don’t worry. I appreciate your honesty.” She wiped away a tear off her cheek and I felt even worse. “Do you mind if I give you some advice?”

“About what?”

“About Helga.”

My heart stopped. “What about her?”

“You like her, don’t you?” _Like her_ was a huge understatement. I didn’t say anything. “I think you should tell her.” She stood up, but before walking away said, “You might find out she feels the same way… Just a feeling.” And with that, she was gone.

 

**Helga's P.O.V.**

My relationship with Arnold had taken a 180 degrees turn in the last couple of months. We had somehow managed to develop a playful kind of friendship. I didn’t bully him around or make fun of him anymore – or at least not in a mean way. I was starting to be _nicer_ to him. I wasn’t sure why, but it just gradually became that way. And it felt… good. I felt… happy.

I wasn’t constantly worrying about my feelings for him anymore; I could just enjoy being around him, and I finally thought I was on my way to letting him go… when _it_ happened. I wasn’t trying to spy on them. I hadn’t followed them anywhere. But when I went into the kitchen to grab another beer from the fridge, I saw them through the window.

A half hour later, I was upstairs leaning on the balcony railing overlooking the street, wondering why I couldn’t seem to let go. I closed my eyes and saw it all over again in the back of my mind. Lila… Little Miss Perfect… _kissing_ him. I swallowed hard trying to get rid of the lump in my throat.

I should be happy for him… right? When you loved someone, you wanted them to be happy.

“A penny for your thoughts.”

I almost jumped up. I knew that voice.

I heard him step closer and quickly tried to compose myself. The last thing I wanted was for him to see me like this. When I thought it was safe, I glanced back at him.

“Oh, It’s you… _football head_.”

He smiled at me, that stupid smile that could light up the whole world around me or turn my heart to stone. Which would it be this time? He came closer and leaned onto the railing next to me.

“Shouldn’t you be downstairs with little Miss _Perfect_?”

Arnold chuckled. “You mean Lila?”

“Who else?”

Again he chuckled. “Lila’s not perfect, Helga.”

“Oh, please Arnoldo! Tell me _one thing_ that’s wrong with her?”

He hesitated for a long moment and I wondered _why the hell_ was I having this conversation. “Well, first of all, she’s not as _funny_ or as … _passionate_ as some people I know.” There was a long pause and then he said, “I blew her off tonight.”

My heart skipped a beat. “What? You blew _who_ off?”

“Lila! Who are we talking about?”

_Wait… what?! He did what?!_

My eyes searched his. “Why?”

“I haven’t felt that way about her in a long time.”

Relief swept over me, but I was suddenly feeling really nervous. “Or maybe you just discovered that she’s not as good at kissing as she is at everything else.”

“Oh, no… I’ll admit she’s a good kisser.”

My eyes jerked up and a smile was playing around the corners of his mouth. I couldn’t hide the jealousy I felt, and if I didn’t know any better, I’d say he was enjoying it!

“But… you’re a much better kisser, Helga.”

My stomach trembled and my breath caught. “How the hell would _you_ know, football head?”

“You’ve kissed me before.”

I felt heat creeping up my cheeks. “Those _hardly_ counted as kisses.”

“They were pretty long, Helga. I still remember.”

"It's called  _acting,_ Arnoldo… I don't know if you're familiar with the term?"

Arnold's smile widened seductively and he leaned in closer to me. "Well, if that's what a fake kiss from you is like, I'd love to find out what a real one tastes like."

All the air left my lungs. What was happening? My heart beat so hard I thought it would jump out of my body. I felt dizzy and everything went blurry. Arnold was standing so close to me, I couldn’t breathe. I lay my hand on his chest to push him away, but the feel of his heartbeat against my palm only made things worse. “In your dreams, football head.”

It happened without me knowing exactly when. One moment, his face was barely inches away, the next his lips were on mine.

His lips were soft and warm, his scent intoxicating. Sensations streamed all over me and my limbs grew weak. The world went still, the music playing in the background faded away and I couldn’t move. Then I felt his fingers slide up to the sides of my face and his thumb brushed the line of my jaw. A tingly vibration travelled all the way down to my feet. My toes curled. Was this really happening?

My trembling hand crawled up to the back of his neck, my mouth opened and his tongue swept in, and just like that years and years of repressed feelings burst free. My fingers dug into his skin, and my tongue met his, stroke for stroke.

One of his hands moved to my back and pulled me closer. This was the single most exhilarating moment of my life, and I was going to savor it as much as I could. I clung on to him, one hand firmly against his back, and the fingers of the other sliding into his hair. His lips became swollen and moist. Our bodies trembled as we pressed against each other.

In a desperate attempt for control, Arnold slightly pulled away and leaned his forehead on mine. His hands were shaking and his jaw was clenched. His eyes were closed.

He let out a ragged breath and said, “I guess I must be dreaming.” And then he half smiled.

His hands moved up to the sides of my face and he gave me one last kiss before completely pulling away. My heartbeat was still racing.

“I think we need to talk.”

_Talk? What did he need to talk about?_

Then a voice called out his name. It was Sid down below.

He glanced down and then said, “I have to go. I promised Sid I’d go with him to drop Hannah and Lila off.”

“Okay.” Was all that came out of my mouth.

“But I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow?”

“Yeah, my essay… Remember? We had a deal.” He chuckled.

“Oh… yeah, okay.”

“And then we can talk…”

“Uh-huh.”

I felt like a complete moron! It was like my brain was paralyzed.

“Great!” He leaned in and this time gave me a kiss on the cheek.

 

**Arnold's P.O.V.**

As I walked away, I had the biggest smile on my face. I knew I probably looked like an idiot, but I didn’t care.

Tomorrow… I was going to tell Helga tomorrow, no matter what happened.


	9. The Big 'L' Word

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 9 – The Big ‘L’ Word  **

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

It was the Sunday after the Halloween party, and Helga was coming over at noon. I had stayed up so late last night thinking about the kiss and how I was finally going to tell, that I hadn’t woken up until 11:30 am. I had a quick shower and made my bedroom look presentable; I threw the stuff lying around into the closet and shoved things in drawers. There was no time to actually organize anything.

I was so nervous I couldn’t eat breakfast and changed my shirt three times. I kept going over and over what I was going to say to her in my head.

My little speech went something like this:

_Helga, we’ve known each other for…_ Wait. How long was it… 13… 14 years? …Never mind. _We’ve known each other for a long time; most of our lives actually. I know we haven’t always been the best of friends, seeing as you liked spending most of your time bullying me around_ … No, scratch that. _I know we haven’t always been the best of friends, but I’ve always thought that you’re someone really special, and…_ No, no, no. Start again.

_Helga, I’ve never met anyone like you. You’re smart and passionate; you make your own rules and you don’t care what people think; you’re tough and hard on the outside, but you’re warm and caring inside; and when you love someone, you’re the kind of person that would move heaven and earth just to make them happy. I know that what I’m about to say might sound crazy, but… I’m in love with you. I know that you love me, too…_ Should I tell her that I know about her feelings for me? That might open up a whole lot of questions I’m not sure I want to answer, and she might feel cornered. Best to just stick to my own feelings. _I’m in love with you, Helga, and I know that if you gave me a chance I could make you really happy._

There! That didn’t sound that bad… or was it too mushy?  

As the clock arrows got closer to the 12, I started feeling more anxious. How was I going to concentrate on writing an essay like this? Should I talk to her first or should I wait until after we’d finished the essay?

Maybe this hadn’t been such a great idea…

There was a light knock on the door… _Oh boy!_

I threw myself onto the couch and tried to look casual. “Come in! It’s open.”

The door opened and Helga stepped into my bedroom. She was carrying a pile of books.

“Hi,” was all she said.

“Hey… Let me help you with that.” I stood up and walked over to where she was standing and took the books from her hands.

 I put the books on the desk and turned around. She was still standing close to the door. We looked at each other in silence and she started fidgeting with her hands. The air in the room suddenly felt tense and I was sure we had never felt this awkward before.

It was Helga who broke the silence. “Listen, Arnold, I…”

“Helga,” I cut in. “About last night... We need to talk.”

She suddenly looked terrified. “Can that wait until after we’ve worked on your essay?” she asked.

“Err… yeah, sure!” I pulled another chair up close to the desk and gestured her to sit down.

She did and I sat down next to her. I opened my laptop and showed her what I had written for my essay so far.

It didn’t take her more than a minute or two to read. “ _This_ is all you have so far?”

I chuckled. “Yeah… I guess this isn’t my forte, huh?”

She laughed and that cut the tension a bit. “I can see why you needed help, football head. This is terrible!”

“It isn’t _that_ bad.”

“It stinks! Like, first of all, where’s the introduction?”

I pointed to the first few lines. “It’s right there!”

“That’s hardly an introduction, Arnold. Your introduction is supposed to _capture_ the reader’s attention; it should explain the importance of your essay’s topic, and it should include a thesis sentence. As for the rest of it, it has no coherence whatsoever.”

I looked at her sideways. “I think you’re worse than the teacher, Helga.”

“Hey, I’m just trying to help you out.” She pulled the laptop closer to herself and positioned her hands over the keyboard. “First of all, tell me what the purpose of your essay is. What are you trying to say?”

I started explaining it to her and she listened intently. Then, her fingers quickly started moving over the keyboard. When she was done, she pushed the laptop away and asked, “How’s that?”

I read what she had written carefully and was surprised at how good a writer she was. In just a few sentences, she had actually managed to make my topic sound interesting. “Wow, Helga, you’re good.”

“I know.” She smirked.  

“There’s just one problem. If you keep writing this good, I don’t think I’ll be able to pass it as mine.”

“I’m not gonna write the whole thing for you, football head. It’s your damn essay! I’m just giving you something to start with. But I’ll be here helping you out.”

We spent the next five or six hours working on my essay. Grandma had brought us up some snacks and a couple of sandwiches, and the truth is we had a lot of fun writing it. The books Helga had brought with her had proven themselves useful and I was on my way to writing a pretty good essay.

I was down to writing the last few sentences. When I pressed the last key, I exhaled and turned the laptop so Helga could read it.

She read the whole thing and smirked. “Not bad, football head. Not bad at all.”

I grinned. “Thanks, Helga. I couldn’t have done it without you. Well… at least not _this_ good.”

 “You’re welcome, Arnoldo.”

I leaned back in the desk chair and stretched my arms up. My back was killing me.

“Well,” she said, as she stood up and starting gathering her books. “I think I should go…”

“No, wait!” I sat up. “We haven’t talked about what happened last night.”

“L-Last night?” Her cheeks burned bright red. “What could we have to talk about last night?”

“You know exactly what, Helga.”

“Do we really need to talk about it? I mean we… we kissed. Yeah, okay, that happens! There’s no need to _talk_ about it.”

“There is. I need to tell you something.”

“Okay…” She gulped. “What do you need to tell me?”

“Could you just wait a minute? I _really_ have to pee. I won’t be long, just… don’t go, okay?”

“Fine, football head. Just go!”

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

Arnold needed to talk… but I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hear what he had to say. As I watched him leave for the bathroom, I seriously thought about sneaking away. I sat down again and tried to calm my nerves. It probably wasn’t even that big a deal… Maybe he just wanted to tell me that however _fantastic_ that kiss had been, we were just friends, and we should remain that way… but… did I really want him to say that? I took a deep calming breath and glanced around the bedroom.

…And then I saw it. Right there on the bookshelf. Was that…? No, it couldn’t be! I stood up and walked over to pick it up, and my blood ran cold. This… this was _my_ notebook. What the hell was it doing here? Why did Arnold have it?

My hands trembled as I flicked through the pages, desperately trying to prove that this wasn’t it. It had to be some other notebook that looked exactly like mine… It wasn’t. It was mine. I snapped it shut.

My heartbeat went crazy! My whole body was shivering as I started pacing about the room. I had to literally breathe in and breathe out so I wouldn’t pass out.

Then the door opened and Arnold walked in.

I stopped and looked him straight in the eye. “Did you read this?”

Arnold was so stunned he took a step backwards. “I-I….”

“It was on your bookshelf! I glanced that way and I thought it looked familiar… and _what do you know_? It’s _mine_!”

“Helga, I…”

I waited, but nothing came out of his mouth.

“Did you read this?” I asked again, punctuating every word.

“Yes, but –“

_Oh my God!_ I suddenly felt dizzy. “W-Why?”

He was speechless again.

“I can’t believe this! Why do you have it?” A thought occurred to me and it almost broke my heart. “Did… did _Phoebe_ give this to you?”

“No! No, she didn’t! I found it. It was on her nightstand the day I carried you up to her bedroom.”

I felt my eyes grow to the size of saucers. “That was… what? Three, four months ago? Y-You’ve had it for that long?” I took a deep breath trying to keep myself under control. “Why did you take it? Why would you take something like that that doesn’t belong to you?”

“I don’t know, Helga. I wasn’t thinking. I just saw it and picked it up.” Arnold was starting to look so worried and desperate.

“Why did you pick it up?!”

“I knew it was yours…”

“Yeah… so? You had _no right_ to read this!” I lashed out. “Arnold, you have no idea how private this is! How… How could you?” Tears burned my eyes and my throat started to close up.

“I’m so sorry, Helga!” He took a step closer, holding his arms out, but I shoved them away. “You don’t need to be embarrassed, okay? I –“

“Embarrassed?” I laughed bitterly. “You have no idea _what_ I’m feeling, Arnold… and it has _nothing_ to do with embarrassment. I’m _pissed_!” I looked down at the notebook in my hand. “So… I guess you know now, huh?” He knew exactly what I was talking about.

He didn’t say anything, but I could see the confirmation in his eyes.

“Helga, I’m sorry.”

“Sorry? How could I _ever_ forgive you for this?”

His jaw clenched and I his eyes turned watery. “Wow… That’s _so unfair_ coming from you, Helga.”

“Excuse me?”

“What about all the times you screwed me up, huh? What about all the times you lied to me, _stole_ from me? What about that whole thing with Cecile?” He was shouting now. “I forgave you for all those things, Helga!”

A voice in the back of my mind was telling me he was right, that I should just stop and calm down, but I couldn’t. My emotions were running wild.

“That… All of that was different.”

“Oh, yeah? Different how? Because it was _you_ screwing with _me_?”

“ _Screwing_ with you? What? Was this some kind of revenge?” Tears were streaming down my face now. “Is… Is that why you kissed me last night?”

_Please say no!_  

“What?! No!” Arnold ran his hands down his face and breathed heavily. “This is getting way out of hand.” He looked me straight in the eye. “Helga, I wasn’t screwing with you, okay? I’ve never, _ever_ , done _anything_ to hurt you. If I forgave you for all those dumb things you did, why can’t you forgive me for this?”

“Like I said… It’s different, Arnold.” I dried my tears with my palms. “It’s different because I was just a stupid kid. I did all those crazy things because… I was in love.”

His eyes still held mine as he said, “I still don’t see the difference. Helga, _I’m_ just a stupid kid, and I’m also in love… I’m in love with _you_.”

New tears welled in my eyes and my breathing grew uneven as I stared back at him. _No_ … This… This couldn’t be… I shook my head. Arnold _in love with me_?

“Arnold… I don’t think you know what you’re saying.”

“I know _exactly_ what I’m saying, Helga.” 

It was suddenly too much. I started walking to the door, but Arnold stood in front of me.

“Helga, please…” He pleaded.

“I-I can’t. I need to go.” I sidestepped him and he grabbed my arm. I looked up. “You have no idea what _this_ ” I held up the notebook. “…means to me, Arnold. It’s not just about you. It’s about me too. You don’t know how long I’ve had this bottled up inside me, how long I’ve been hiding who I really am.” I paused to swallow the lump in my throat. “And then… just like that, I learn that you went behind my back and –. “ My voice broke and I pulled my arm free. “Just let me go. I really need to go.”

He let me go.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

I heard her footsteps fading as she ran down the stairs. My throat was burning from fighting back tears, and my heart was shriveling inside my chest. I stumbled over to the bed and sat down, burying my face in my hands. My jaw clenched and tears spilled from my eyes.

Moments later, I heard Grandpa by the door. “Shortman, what happened? We heard –.” There was a pause, and then he slowly walked over to the bed and sat down. I felt his hand on my shoulder, but he didn’t say anything.

When I felt like I could speak, I looked up and said, “I think I messed things up really bad, Grandpa.”

“We all mess up sometimes, Shortman.”

I shook my head. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone... I love her. And I know she loves me, too! After everything I’ve had to put up with over the years, how can she not forgive me for _one_ mistake?”

“You haven’t given her enough time to forgive you.” He squeezed my shoulder and let go. “Look, Shortman, I don’t know what happened… But have you stopped to think that maybe she’s just… scared?”

That gave me pause. “Scared?”

“Mm hmm. Love can be scary. Maybe you didn’t mess up _that_ bad. Maybe no matter what you did, she still would’ve ran away... Or maybe you did.” He tittered. “I don’t know. But just give it time, Arnold. Things have a way of working themselves out.”

I could see what Grandpa was saying, but I couldn’t help thinking about what would’ve happened if I’d told her sooner. What would’ve happened if I’d never taken the notebook, or if I’d come clean about it? What would’ve happened if I hadn’t needed to pee?

So much for rehearsing so many times how I was going to tell her that I loved her…

The next day at school, Helga was obviously avoiding me. There were a few differences from the last time, though. First of all, this time I knew why she was avoiding me. Second, this was a lot worse than the last. Third, I wasn’t trying to get her to talk to me.

As if my day couldn’t get any worse, Phoebe walked up to me in the hallway as I was putting my books in the locker and lashed out.

“What is _wrong_ with you? How could you do that?” She yelled. I had never seen her this upset before. “Did you ever stop to think how you might affect other people with what you did? Helga was at my house last night, screaming at me! In all our years of friendship, that had _never_ happened before! Thank you _so much_ , Arnold!”

Before I could say anything, she was already storming down the hall. I slumped onto the lockers feeling defeated.

A hand went to my shoulder. “Don’t worry, man, she’ll get over it. She lashed out at me first, a minute ago.”

“Why did she lash out at _you_?” I asked Gerald.

“I accidentally let it slip that I knew about the notebook.” Gerald slumped onto the lockers next to me.

It was my turn to put my hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, man.”

“It’s okay.” He shrugged. “She’ll forgive me… eventually.”

“I wish I could say the same.”

“Are you gonna tell me what happened?”

I filled Gerald in with all the details.

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

I was just outside Phoebe’s house, waiting for her to come home. I had rehearsed what I was going to say to her a dozen times in my head, but when I finally saw her walk up to her front door, my mind went completely blank.

“Helga? What are you doing here?”

Without thinking, I just threw my arms around her. “Oh, Phoebe, I’m so sorry!”

She was too surprised to say anything at first, but she eventually hugged me back and said, “No, Helga, _I’m_ sorry!”

I pulled away from her and grabbed her shoulders. “No, _I’m_ sorry. Phoebe, you’re all I have. I shouldn’t have yelled at you the way I did. I was so upset, I… I took it all out on you! But it wasn’t your fault.”

“Helga, you gave me your things to take care of them and I failed you.”

“Well, if we’re completely honest, I gave them to you so you would get _rid_ of them because I didn’t have the strength to do it myself.”

Tears started to form in her eyes. “I’m _so_ sorry! I really am! It’s just that I really enjoy reading your poems, and I must’ve accidentally left your notebook lying around. I didn’t mean –“

“It’s okay, Pheebs.” I squeezed her hand. “I know you didn’t mean for this to happen. It was that _stupid football head_ who took something he shouldn’t have!”

Phoebe rubbed her eyes. “I can’t believe he did that!”

“Yeah, well… He did.”

“Do you want to come inside and talk? I bought some ice cream.” She lifted a paper bag she was carrying. “I was feeling really depressed because you were mad at me, and was going to eat it all by myself. But now we can share it.”

I smiled and shrugged one shoulder. “I could eat some ice cream.”

She opened the door and we went up to her bedroom. I told her everything that had happened; every last detail.

For about thirty whole seconds, she was speechless. Then she was finally able to say, “So, you’re telling me that Arnold is… _in love_ with you?”

“That’s what he said.”

“Helga, this it _huge_! W-What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know, Pheebs. I think I might’ve screwed things up beyond repair. It’s just that… I don’t know.”

“You had a right to be angry, Helga.”

“I know, but… I think I overreacted because I was so scared. He read my poems Phoebe, knowing they were _mine_ , knowing they were about _him_ … I’ve been hiding this for so long and then suddenly, out of nowhere, he knows! And he doesn’t just know, he’s actually saying that –“ My voice started to break and Phoebe lay a hand on mine. “…that he loves me too.”

“It’s a lot to handle.” Phoebe said, and passed me the ice cream.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

A few days later, Gerald and I were sitting on a bench outside the school grounds when Phoebe walked up to us with a faint smile on her face.

She held her hand out to Gerald and said, “Okay… I’m ready to forgive you, dummy.” Gerald took her hand in his, and opened his mouth, but she went on, “I still don’t appreciate you not telling me, but I guess I understand now… I understand that you were just trying to protect your friend. Friends keep secrets. The truth is, if things had been the other way around, I wouldn’t have told on Helga either.”

Gerald wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. “I’m so happy to hear it. I missed you.” Then, he looked back at me and teased, “I’m never getting into trouble with you again for his sorry ass.”

They both chuckled.

“Phoebe, I’m really sorry.” I said. “I shouldn’t have –“

“It’s okay, Arnold. I forgive you, too.” She smiled. “What are you going to do now?”

“I have no idea. Got any advice?”

“Helga is… Helga.” She shrugged. “Maybe you should just give her some space. She’ll come around. You’ll see.”

I nodded, wishing I felt as sure about that as Phoebe did.


	10. Taking Chances

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 10 – Taking Chances **

****

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

Nearly a month had gone by and I still hadn’t talked to Arnold, a fact of which Phoebe liked to remind me of almost every day. I had grown so sick of listening to her advice on Arnold. She didn’t understand that I just wasn’t ready to talk to him. What would I even say? I had enough going on in my life deciding what the hell I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I couldn’t deal with that too.

As we walked home together after school one day, as usual she started nagging me about Arnold.

“Helga, it’s almost been a month! When are you finally going to talk to him?”

 “Gee! Has it really been a month already?” I asked sarcastically.

“You know it has, Helga.”

I rolled my eyes. Phoebe was one of the smartest people I knew, but sometimes she just didn’t get my sarcasm.

“Well, I dunno Pheebs, I mean… I guess I’ve just been really busy… you know, applying for college and so son… Oh, and guess what else?” I narrowed my eyes and looked at her sideways. “Not giving a damn about Arnold!”

“He’s been asking me about you, you know?”

I decided to ignore her. Maybe that way she would finally take the hint and shut up.

We continued to walk down the street and for a while the only sounds I heard were our feet on the sidewalk, the occasional car passing by and birds chiming. Maybe she _had_ taken the hint… I was barely starting to enjoy the silence, when Phoebe decided she wasn’t done nagging me.

“I just don’t want you to regret it later.”

That did it. “Oh, for the love of Pete!” I stopped and let out an exasperated breath. “How am I supposed to stop thinking about him if you won’t stop talking about him?!”

She came to stand in front of me. “You can’t keep avoiding him forever!”

“I don’t have to keep avoiding him forever. I just need to keep avoiding him until we all go off to college and I don’t have to see that stupid football shaped head of his ever again!” I was saying it casually, but the truth is the mere thought of never seeing Arnold again crushed my heart.  

Phoebe gave me a pitying look.

“Crimeny, Pheebs! When did life get so friggin’ complicated?” I sat down on the sidewalk and leaned my head on my knees.

She sat down next to me. “I think you’re making this a lot more complicated than it needs to be, Helga. What’s keeping you away from him?”

I breathed in pushing back the tears that were already starting to form. “What if I let him down, Pheebs?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, look at me! I’m not exactly what you call _normal_!”

She considered this for a moment and then said, “Maybe he doesn’t need normal. He likes you for who you are… _Loves you_ , actually. He knows who you are.”  

_Loves me_ … I still hadn’t gotten used to that fact. Just the idea of it turned my insides upside down.

“Even if he does… love me,” Even saying it aloud was difficult. “…I don’t know how to open up to people, Pheebs. You’re the only person who I’ve actually let get close enough to me. I always end up pushing them away... I always mess things up. What if I let Arnold get close to me, and I mess it up? What if I have him, and then lose him? What if I hurt him, or worse, what if he ends up hurting _me_?”

“That’s a lot of ‘what ifs’, Helga… but here’s another one: _What if_ everything turns out okay? There will always be problems, that’s just life… but you have the chance here to finally get everything you’ve always wanted. You just need to let go and take the bull by its horns.”

I felt so hopeless. “I don’t know if I can…”

“Well, only _you_ can decide. I _will_ say this, though. Arnold _deserves_ to know the truth. He deserves to know what’s going on. You’ve kept him waiting long enough, punishing him for a stupid mistake he made. I really think you should talk to him.”

Phoebe was right. As I lay in bed that night, I thought about everything she said. I imagined all the possibilities and my heart filled with longing, but then fear would get in the way. Arnold didn’t deserve any of this. He deserved to be with someone who could make him happy. Someone who could love him completely and openly, and I wasn’t sure I could be that person. Arnold deserved an explanation, and with that thought, I went looking for him all over school the next day.

I finally found him at the library. He was silently bent over a book reading. I paused for a moment just to look at him. It had been so long since I’d let myself just look at him. My heart once again filled with longing.

I made my way up to him and quietly said, “Arnold…”

He looked up at me with huge eyes. “H-Helga…? W-What’s up?”

For a brief five seconds, nothing came out of my mouth, then I blurted out, “I’ve had some complaints… Apparently you’ve been harassing my friends?” _Or should I say friend?_

His expression turned despairing. “If you won’t talk to me, what else am I supposed to do?”

“Oh, I don’t know… Give up, maybe?”

“You _could_ just forgive me. Helga, I swear I –”

“Arnold, I forgive you…” I interrupted. He didn’t look very convinced, so I sighed and sat down next to him. “You have my forgiveness… Really, you do! But this isn’t about forgiving you or not, it’s about…”

All of a sudden, his eyes seemed hopeful. “What, Helga? Tell me…”

I took a deep breath and said, “Do you know why I stopped talking to you last time?”

“No, not really…” His eyebrows puckered.  

“I heard you…”

“Heard me? Saying what?”

“I heard you when you were talking to Gerald, while you were coming down the stairs.”

He looked confused, so I explained. “You were saying how you could never fall in love with a girl like me. You said that I only made your life miserable, and –“

“Helga, I didn’t know what I was saying.” He cut in. “I was stupid! I mean –“ He was starting to raise his voice, so some guy studying nearby shushed him.

I glared at him. “Quit the shushing, you nimrod! We’re tryin’ have a conversation!”  

He glowered at us and went to sit somewhere else.

Arnold sighed and went on, “Helga, I’m sorry for what I said. I-I was starting to have all these feelings, and…”

“And you were scared?”

“Yeah, I guess I was… and kinda embarrassed. I didn’t want Gerald to know.”

“Arnold, you don’t have to apologize for what you said. You were right… I _was_ a nightmare. I was nothing but a pain in the ass to you. You had every right to think that. But that’s my point…”

“I’m not following you…”

“You felt afraid for what, a couple o’ weeks? Imagine feeling like that, but a thousand times worse. Try feeling that way for years… That’s how I felt, Arnold; Ashamed of what I felt, afraid of my own feelings… hiding them from everyone, _especially_ you.”

He looked away. “And then I went and read your notebook…”  

“And it’s not like you just found out about a stupid crush, Arnold. You read my deepest darkest secrets.” I couldn’t keep looking at his face, so I looked away too. “The thing is… I don’t know how to be vulnerable. I’m just too vulnerable when it comes to you and… I get scared. If I got too close to you and got hurt, I –“

“I’d never hurt you, Helga.” He reached for my hand and grabbed it.

My heart crumbled into a million pieces as he squeezed my hand gently, but I managed to smile faintly. “You already have, football head.”

His eyes glistened. “I didn’t mean to, I would never –“

“I know,” I said. “I know you didn’t mean to. I know you would never deliberately try to hurt me, but… I’m just not ready to take the risk. I don’t think I’m strong enough.”

“Helga, you’re the toughest person I know!”

“I’m not that tough. I just act like I am.”

His face looked defeated, and I hated myself for what I was about to do.

“So, you see Arnold… This isn’t your fault.” I pulled my hand free and got up. “I hope you understand.”

And with that, I was gone.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

In a way, I did understand. But that didn’t make me feel any better. In fact, it made me feel even worse. There was nothing I could do about it. I wasn’t the problem.

I had always known Helga was full of layers, but I had thought that once I managed to pull off the tough exterior, I’d find the soft layers underneath. I hadn’t counted on stumbling into a brick wall.

The following months went by, and I thought about her every single day. We sometimes ran into each other, but the most we said was ‘hi’ or ‘hello’. First, there was Christmas, which I spent at the boarding house with my grandparents, Ernie and Mr. Hyunh. Oskar and Suzie had moved away a few years ago. Then, there was a big New Year’s Eve party at Gerald’s.

Spring came and most of my friends were receiving their acceptance letters from college. Gerald got into the Film Academy he wanted in California, and Phoebe got accepted at a University in New York. They had talked about it and both decided to keep their relationship going long distance. Rhonda got into a fashion design school; Sid and Stinky decided to take a year off and travel around together; Harold was staying in Hillwood to work at his uncle’s family business; Lila got a scholarship to study abroad; and Eugene decided to move to the big city and try to make it as a professional dancer.

I later found out that Helga had also been accepted at the same university as Phoebe in New York and was, in fact, going to study literature.  

I felt like everyone was moving forwards, and I was just stuck. I didn’t know what I wanted. I received a couple of acceptance letters from universities I’d applied to, but I couldn’t make up my mind. I felt like it should be something I just knew in my guts, but I wasn’t feeling anything.

Then, one day, I received a letter that I wasn’t expecting. The envelope had my name and address on it, so I tore it open and began to read:

_Dear Mr. Arnold Shortman,_

_We are very pleased to inform you that you have gladly been accepted into our Student Scholarship Programme ‘Un Grano de Arena’. The academic and personal accomplishments you have achieved within your school and community reflect what we value, respect and expect in the students that enter our programme._

_In anticipation of the questions you may have, we have enclosed a student starter package with all the information you’ll need. Also included, you will find the contact information of our Administration Office._

_We welcome you as part of our community and look forward to hearing from you soon._

_Sincerely,_

_Josefina Velazquez_

I blinked a few times and read it twice again. _How…? When…?_

“I see you finally received a reply.” Came Grandpa’s voice from behind.

I looked back and said. “I don’t understand. I never applied for this scholarship.”

He smiled at me slyly. “Oh, yes you did.”

“B-But…”

“Arnold, your grandmother and I have been watching you mope about for the last few months, and we remembered how excited you were when you told us about this program back in Costa Rica. Don’t pretend like we don’t know about the other acceptance letters, but we think there’s a reason why you haven’t replied. Look…” He said, and placed both his hands on my shoulders. “…this is just another option. We think this might be good for you, but this is your decision and we’ll support you whatever you decide. Just think about it.”

I carried the letter upstairs to my bedroom and went online, searching for more information about the program. I found all kinds of testimonials of students that had enrolled and loved it. I imagined myself in those same places from the pictures, working with kids and helping rural communities. A feeling of anticipation filled my chest, something I hadn’t felt in a long time. Maybe this is what I needed. Maybe this could be what I wanted.

I went to bed that night thinking that I still had some time to make a decision, but a part of me knew that my mind was already made up.

April came, and with it my final decision. I had accepted the scholarship. I was still waiting to know where they were sending me first. I had asked to go to San Lorenzo; I wanted to go to the place where my parents had spent the last years of their lives, but nothing was certain yet.

Before the month was over, my grandparents decided to throw me a going-away party. They said it was never too soon to start celebrating. I could see they were very excited for me, but I also knew they would be very sad to see me leave.

“Oh, Kimba!” Grandma said, as we waited for the guests to arrive. “I’m so proud of you!”

“Thanks, Grandma.” I smiled and hugged her.

“I’m going to miss you so much, though.” She hugged me back.

“I’m going to miss you too, Grandma.”

She suddenly turned serious and looked me straight in the eye. “Just remember, stay close to the lifeboats. And don’t jump off, no matter what happens!”

“Pookie,” Grandpa said, “He’s not going on a boat! He’s going to South America… Or is it Central America?” 

Just then, the doorbell rang and the guests started to arrive. All my closest friends showed up… All of them, except for one. Helga wasn’t there. I tried not to let it bother me, but a part of me couldn’t help wishing she would come.

Grandma ordered some pizzas and baked a big cake. The party ended up being a huge success. We had a great time. We laughed and danced, and sang to a karaoke machine Ernie had brought down. It was sad knowing that we weren’t all going to see each other that often anymore, but we promised to stay in touch.

“Hey, man, listen…” Gerald said, as he grabbed another slice of pizza. “I’m really glad you decided to move on. I think this is gonna be really good for you.”

“Yeah, I’m excited about this, Gerald. I feel like this is what I was meant to do.”

“I’m gonna miss you, man…” He hugged me and gave me a pat on the back.

“I know... I’m gonna miss you too.” We both smiled and did our handshake thing. “And hey… I’m really happy you’re following your dream. I know you’re gonna be an awesome filmmaker.”

He bit into his slice of pizza and chewed. “I might make a film about the adventures of a little guy in the jungle in Central America.”

“I’ll keep you posted on ideas.” I chuckled.

“Hey… Arnold…?”

I looked back and saw Phoebe looking up at me. “What’s up, Pheebs?”

“I have something for you.” She pulled out a little paper bag from her purse and gave it to me.

“What is it?”

“It’s a gift from Helga.”

“Oh…” Hearing her name spoken aloud made my heart twitch.

“I’m sorry she couldn’t be here to give it to you personally. I’m sure she would’ve –“

“It’s okay, Pheebs.” I didn’t want to open it just then, so I put it in my pocket. “Thank you.”

“So… Are you excited?”

“Yeah, I am excited.” I smiled, but it didn’t really reach my eyes. I was thinking about Helga now.

Phoebe could tell, but she just smiled back.

After a while, people started to leave until the house looked empty again. Ernie, Mr. Hyunh and I helped clean up the place and then I thanked my grandparents for throwing me such a great party and said good night. I needed some time alone now to think.

While I walked up the stairs to my bedroom, I pulled Helga’s gift from out of my pocket and opened it. It was a small golden compass. I continued to stare at it as I reached the door and walked in.

I closed the door behind me and looked up, and felt my heart stop.

Helga was standing in the middle of my bedroom.

“Hey, Arnold!”


	11. Regret is a Two Way Street

Disclaimer: I do not own Hey, Arnold! or any of its characters.

** Chapter 11 – Regret is a Two Way Street **

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

“Helga…” I still felt like my heart wasn’t beating and the pressure in my chest grew stronger. “W-what are you doing here?”  

She arched an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “Gee, _football head_ … Way to greet a guest.”

“I-I wasn’t expecting you. I thought you weren’t gonna come.”  

She lifted her shoulder in a half shrug. “I wasn’t, but… I’m here now, aren’t I?”

My heartbeat gradually picked up. “Yeah, but… W-when did… Why –“

“I didn’t sneak up here or anything, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

I shook my head and slightly frowned. “Why did you come up here? I didn’t see you –“

“Your Grandmother let me in. She, uhm… She seemed pretty excited to see me.”

“Yeah… err… she’s always happy to see Eleanor.” But that didn’t really explain why she was up here and why she hadn’t joined the party.

Helga half smiled and, as if she had read my mind, started to explain, “Anyway… I told her I wanted to talk to you… _alone_ , and asked her if she could bring you out into the hall,… but when I saw everyone there having fun, I kinda chickened out and turned to leave.” She paused and rubbed the back of her neck. “She stopped me and said I could wait up here if I wanted to, and she’d go find you.”

“Err… Everyone left over an hour ago.”

“Yeah…” Helga laughed nervously. “I guess she forgot, huh? I’ve been waiting up here for a while.” Our eyes met and then Helga looked away and started fidgeting with her hands. “I-I guess I should leave… I’ve been feeling kinda stupid up here, but I didn’t wanna run into anyone if I went downstairs.”

She started walking towards the door.

“No, Helga, wait…” She halted and turned around. “What was is it you wanted to talk about?”

Her face turned pink and a corner of her mouth twitched. “Uh... Nothing really. Honestly, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing here.”  

One of my eyebrows lifted. “You expect me to believe that?”

“I-I…” Helga sighed heavily and threw her hands out in frustration. “I don’t know, okay, _football_ head! I-I’ve just been thinking a lot lately, and I… I don’t know!” She squeezed her eyes shut and turned her back to me.

“ _What_ , Helga?” I took a step closer to her.” What have you been thinking about?”

“About… _everything_. You… and me… About what happened.” She let out an exasperated breath and turned around to face me. “I… I just…”

“What?” I took another step closer.  

Her eyes glistened. “I can’t stop thinking that I don’t know which one of these days is gonna be the last time I ever see you.”

I felt my own eyes start to prickle. “Helga, we’re gonna see each other again.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Of course I do.”

By then, I noticed how close we were now. No more than two feet separated us. For a while, neither of us said anything, we just stood there looking into each other’s eyes. There was so much to say, but no words were being spoken.

My gut clenched into a hard knot as I thought about what she’d said and I swallowed hard to get rid of the lump that had formed in my throat.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything, when Helga’s hands reached up to grab my face and pulled me down for a hard kiss. For a moment, my mind was a complete blur and I couldn’t move, but then the heat and moisture of Helga’s mouth sank in and I was undone. As if my hands had just been relieved from an invisible binding, they impatiently moved all over her back and pulled her closer.

I felt her fingers slide to the back of my neck, digging into my skin, and all the nerve endings in my body came alive, overtaking my senses and flooding me with need.

I kissed her back with the same eagerness, and she moaned and pressed up against me, pushing me backwards. She continued to push me backwards until we stumbled together onto the couch, and I accidentally dropped what I was holding in my hand. We heard a hard thump and tore our lips apart to see what had fallen onto the floor.

It was the golden compass she had given me. We looked back at each other, our breath coming in short pants, our own want reflected in the other’s eyes. I swallowed and picked the compass off the floor. I stared at it for a moment and heard Helga say, “I didn’t want you to get lost somewhere in the middle of the jungle.”

The corner of my mouth lifted and I chuckled softly as I examined it more closely.

Helga was still half-wrapped in my arms. “It’s also a locket.” She took the compass from my hand and showed me how to open it.

My forehead creased. “It doesn’t have a picture inside.”

“I know… I figured you could put any picture you wanted in it; maybe a picture of your grandparents… something that would remind you of home.”

I looked up into her eyes. “What if I want a picture of you?”

“Well,” She smirked and pretended to consider it. “I guess we could arrange that… with one condition.”

I grinned lopsidedly and snaked my arm around her waist. “What condition?”

She reached into her t-shirt and pulled out a heart-shaped locket with a very old picture of me. “I think mine needs an update.”

My heart twitched as I looked at my picture in her locket. _How long had she had this?_ The picture was so old. “Helga… When _exactly_ did you start having feelings for me?”  

“What?” She straightened and squirmed uncomfortably away from me. “Why are you asking me this? Why do you wanna know?”

“I just want to know...”

“A long time ago… Let’s just leave it at that.”

“C’mon, Helga… Just tell me, was it before or after you started bullying me?”

She moved further away on the couch and dropped her gaze. “It was before, okay? I-I’ve always liked you… Ever since I first met you.”

“Then why were you always mean to me? Why didn’t you ever just tell me how you felt? I think I would’ve understood. I might’ve even… liked you back.”

Her shoulders sagged. “Arnold… Is it really necessary to talk about this?”

“It’s just weird for me… I mean, I always thought you kinda hated me.”

She looked back at me then. “I’ve never hated you, football head… I-I’ve always lo-lo- _loved_ you… I was just afraid of showing my sensitive side. I didn’t want to be picked on,” She knitted her eyebrows. “…so I picked on you.”

“It’s okay, Helga. I’ve forgiven you.” I reached out and grabbed her hand. “I know it sounds strange, but… In a way, I think I always knew.”

She looked down at our joined hands and smiled weakly.

“I think I should go. It’s getting pretty late.”

I nodded and smiled back. “Yeah, okay… I’ll walk you home.”

“I can walk home on my own, Arnold,” she said, but I was already putting my jacket on and grabbing a set of keys from the desk.

“Like you said, it’s pretty late, so… let me walk you home.”  

As we walked to her house in the middle of the night together, we didn’t say much. We just held hands and enjoyed the comfortable silence between us. We both had a lot to think about.

When we got to her stoop, I stood in front of her and took both her hands in mine. I leaned in and kissed her gently on the lips. “Good night, Helga.”

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

It was a quick, simple kiss, but it still made my insides flutter. There were so many butterflies flapping around in my stomach I thought I was gonna puke. It all felt like a dream, like I needed to slap myself hard in the face to wake up. But I didn’t want to wake up… This was a dream come true.

“Good night, Arnold.”

He let go of my hands and I started walking – _or should I say floating?_ – up the stairs to my front door.

“Hey… Helga…?”

I stopped mid-staircase and looked back at him.

He was rubbing the back of his neck and his cheeks were blushing. “I was wondering… would you maybe consider going to prom with me?”

_Prom?!_ I felt the color drain out of my face. “Are you seriously asking me to go to _prom_ with you?”

Now his whole face turned a deep red. “Yeah… I guess I am.”

My heart had started drumming so loud inside my chest it was hard to think straight. “Uh…” _Crimeny, Helga, get a grip! Answer the stupid question!_ “…Yeah, I’ll go to prom with you, football head.”

Arnold smiled and waited as I continued to walk up the stairs. When I opened the front door, he waved good-bye and I watched him walk down the street and disappear out of sight.

I closed the door gently behind me and leaned against it. My heart was still drumming so hard. I pressed my fingers to my lips and drew in a shaky breath. If I closed my eyes, I could still feel Arnold’s lips on mine, I could still taste him in my mouth.

My mind started spinning like crazy. _What was I doing?_ He was leaving soon! He had asked me to go to prom with him, and I had accepted! Should I go with him? What if this was a big mistake? How was I going to say good-bye to him after everything that just happened?

I ran my hands down my face and tried to calm down. _It’s okay… It’s okay, Helga._ I took a deep breath. _You’ll just deal with it when the time comes. Enjoy it while it lasts. You can pick up the broken pieces when he’s gone._

With more confidence than I was actually feeling, I walked up the stairs to my bedroom. I decided I wasn’t going to worry about that, at least not tonight.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

While I walked back home that night, I couldn’t get the grin off my face, but as I neared the boarding house thoughts started running through my head, ruining the excitement I had been feeling. What was going to happen now? Things had just gotten way more complicated. Could we make a long distance relationship work? A part of me still wanted to go to Central America, but now another part of me wanted to stay. I had been accepted at a University very close to New York; it was about an hour drive away, two at the most. Maybe it wasn’t too late yet.

I had been so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn’t realized I was actually home until I was taking my jacket off and slumping into bed.

On Monday at school, I decided to talk to Gerald about it.

“Arnold, are you _crazy_?! Are you seriously rethinking the whole going to Central America thing?” His whole face was completely distorted with confusion.

“I don’t know, Gerald. I’m really confused.”

“But… You seemed so excited about it the other day!”

“Yeah, I know… but things have changed. I’m really crazy about her….” I lifted my palms up and shrugged.  “I don’t want to regret not taking the chance to be with her.”

“Regret is a two way street, man. You could also regret not taking the scholarship.”

My stomach twisted into a knot and I sagged against the wall. “What am I supposed to do, Gerald? I don’t know what to do.”

“What does your gut tell you?”

“I don’t know.” But somewhere in the back of my mind, I did know. I just didn’t want to listen to it.

Gerald placed his hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eye. “Look, man, all I can say is that you should follow your heart. Do what you have to do, and everything else will fall into place. At least that’s what my Dad tells me.”

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

I was walking down the hall to my next class, when someone reached out from an empty classroom and dragged me inside. He slammed the door shut and pulled me closer, shoving his lips hard against mine.

Blood boiled up to my head and, without thinking, I hurled him away and slapped him right across the face.

“ _Ow_!”

My eyes blinked twice. “Oh my God! …A-Arnold?”

Arnold was looking back at me, his hand gripping his reddened cheek.

“Gee, Helga! You really know how to hit hard!”

“Arnold, I’m so sorry! I-I didn’t know…”

“It’s okay…” He said, as he rubbed his face where I’d just slapped him. “I shouldn’t have surprised you like that. I was just trying to be spontaneous.”

I felt laughter bubbling up inside me but I fought to keep it under control. “I guess old habits die hard. In my defense, I didn’t know it was you.”

“If you had known it was me, would you have let me kiss you?”

“I think you know the answer to that question, football head.”

The stupid football head had the audacity to bite his lip and smirk. “Is it because you have this huge crush on me?”  

My knees grew very weak. “Now you’re just fishing for compliments.”

He chuckled and grabbed my hand, bringing me closer to him. “Hey, I’ve been thinking…”

I raised an eyebrow. “Okay…”

He swallowed hard and turned very serious. “What if I stayed here?”

“What do you mean?” I frowned.

“I got accepted into a University not far from New York…” _What was he saying?_ My heart clenched so tight that I almost couldn’t breathe. “I was thinking maybe I should stay. Maybe we could give this relationship a try.”

My mouth dropped wide open. I didn’t know what to say.

“I know it’s kind of sudden,” He went on, “but… What do you think?”

“Arnold, I-I… I don’t know what to say.”

“Just think about it. We can talk about it on Friday after school. Okay?”

I nodded and gulped.

“We could catch a movie or something.”

“Yeah…” I finally found my voice. “We could invite Gerald and Phoebe to come along. We haven’t all hung out together in a long time.”

“Sounds like a plan.” He smiled and gave me a peck on the cheek. “I’ll see you on Friday.”

He walked out of the classroom leaving me wide-eyed and open-mouthed.

 

**Arnold’s P.O.V.**

The following Friday, Gerald and I were standing outside the movie theater waiting for Helga and Phoebe to get there, so while we waited I told him about the news I had received earlier that day.

“So, they’re actually sending you to _San Lorenzo_? That’s awesome!”

“Yeah,” I smiled. “But like I said, I don’t really know if I’m going yet.”

“You should really think this through, man! You’ve wanted to go there for years! This could be a great opportunity.”

“I know, Gerald, but –“

“I mean, this is San Lorenzo we’re talking about!”

“San Lorenzo?” Came a voice from behind.

I turned and saw Helga and Phoebe approaching. “Err… Yeah. I just got the news today.” My gaze fell on Helga. “But I was just telling Gerald that nothing is decided yet.”

Helga looked away, but Phoebe smiled and said, “Still… That’s great news, Arnold!”

I half smiled and we all went in line to buy our tickets.

The movie wasn’t very interesting. It was a drama Phoebe had picked out, but I had fun snuggling close to Helga and holding her hand.

After the movies, we went to _Dave’s_ to eat some pizza and play some arcade games, just like the old times. It was nice hanging out, just the four of us. Helga was right; we hadn’t done this in a long time.

When Gerald and Phoebe stood up to play some foosball and left Helga and I alone at our table, she abruptly turned around to face me and blurted out, “Arnold… I really think you should go to San Lorenzo.”

It was so unexpected, I almost felt like she’d slapped me in the face again. “W-why? Don’t you think…? I mean, I thought –“

“I obviously _want_ you to stay, but… I also don’t want to come between you and your dream.”

“Helga, I can go to San Lorenzo any time I want. I don’t have to go _now_!” I was starting to feel desperate and anxious. I had known from the beginning what the outcome would be, but a part of me had still dreamed and fantasized with a different result.

“This isn’t just about San Lorenzo.” She squeezed my hand tight. “This is about you helping people, Arnold… about what you’re good at and what you _really_ want to do.”

“But… What’s gonna happen with _us_?”

Her eyes shimmered. “I don’t know…. Life is full of surprises.” Her mouth twisted and she forced a smile. “You never know what’s gonna happen.”

My throat burned from fighting back tears. I already knew the answer to the question, but I had to ask her anyway. “What if we try it long distance? Gerald and Phoebe –“

Her eyes darted to where Gerald and Phoebe were laughing and playing together. “Look, football head, I’m not tryin’ to bust anyone’s dreams here, but I honestly think they’re just kiddin’ themselves. Long distance relationships never work out.”

How did she know that if she’d never tried it before? Maybe it could work out. After all, I was only going to be gone for a year and then I could go wherever I wanted.

I was about to tell her that, when she said, “Can’t we just enjoy what time we have left together? I don’t want to think about all of this now, Arnold. It’s gonna be hard enough for me when I have to _actually_ see you leave.”

I decided to keep my mouth shut and just accept her decision, so I nodded and tried to fake a smile.

A couple of hours later, Gerald and I were dropping them off at Phoebe’s house.

“Bye, Helga.” I was leaning in to kiss her cheek, when she lifted her hand up and cupped my cheek.

“C’mon, football head. Don’t wear the long face… or in your case _horizontal_ face…” She half smiled and I couldn’t help chuckle softly and that lifted the gloom off my mood a bit. “Everything’s gonna be okay…”

I took her face in my hands and pressed my lips to hers. “And you think you’re not tough…”

I must’ve moved something inside her because her eyes were suddenly swarming with unshed tears. “Are we still in for prom night?”

“Yeah… We’re still in.”

She gave me one last kiss and joined Phoebe inside.

 

**Helga’s P.O.V.**

“I don’t get it, Helga.” Phoebe said as she consoled me. “If you’re so upset about it, why didn’t you ask him to stay? He was already willing to do so.”

I lifted my head from her shoulder and wiped a tear off my face. “How could I ask him to stay, Pheebs? I know him. I know this is what he wants. If he ever looked back at this moment with regret, I could never forgive myself.”


End file.
